Better Relationships

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Better Relationships
 
In this issue...
Making a Good Relationship Better
Did You Know
Stepping Stones
March, 2015
Issue #134
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         Rosemary and Phyllis
Her Mentor Center
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Making a Good Relationship Better      


         


You know what they say when you're moving along with no major hurdles--if it ain't broke, don't fix it. But think about the possibility that your relationship has not yet reached its full potential. Believe it or not, no matter how long you've been together, you can still make improvements.


 


According to the field of interpersonal neurobiology, our brains are constantly changing. And that is impacted by how we interact daily. Loving relationships can alter the brain circuits that shape our memories and emotions.


 


Remember that immediate attraction when you first fell in love? This alchemy continues throughout life, and how we treat each other matters. In a loving partnership, we can change neural functions when we decide to be more compassionate. And holding hands is enough to reduce stress and minimize physical pain. So whether you want to release euphoria-inducing chemicals like dopamine or change the wiring in your brain, here are practical ideas to put into play:


 


Invest emotionally. Make time for each other and keep romance alive. A gentle touch or quick hug releases oxytocin, a hormone that facilitates bonding. When you're tense, an affectionate moment can help you feel relaxed and more loved. Studies show that celebrating positive events predict greater relationship satisfaction than complaining about negative ones. Just like with any valuable asset, the efforts you make will be returned in multiples.


 


Eliminate boredom. Lightheartedness is often a casualty of hectic family life. And when the kids go off to college, there's an even greater void. Talk to your partner without being critical, and come to the conversation prepared with suggestions for change. Plan adventures and discover some activities you both enjoy. Take on a physical challenge and train together to make it happen. Have fun and laugh because being playful can lead to greater intimacy.


 


Ask for what you need. No one is a mind reader. Sometimes couples get frustrated and stop talking. Try to understand each other's disappointment or resentment. Meet halfway and get more of what you want. If you invest in your own happiness, your partner won't have to be responsible for your wellbeing. By taking action, you'll feel more confident and your relationship will reap the dividends.


 


Express gratitude often. Compliments serve as positive reinforcement at the very times when you may be taking each other for granted. If you feel distant, try to see your partner in a different light. Look for the qualities you love about each other. And when you're having positive feelings, express them out loud.


 


Only you know what it'll take to feel more fulfilled. Communicate your thoughts directly yet be flexible as you make your way through the differences. A shift in the dynamics can result from something as simple as a weekly date night. Being satisfied with small changes can make a good relationship better.


    


(c) Her Mentor Center, 2015  


  


    

 


Did You Know....          

   


We're counting down to Mother's Day when Fuze Publishing launches our book, Whose Couch is it Anyway? Moving Your Millennial. It chronicles the very different lives of five moms who share one common experience - an "adultolescent" who has come back home to live.


 


We enlist the power of story to chart the journeys of these families who face the challenges of boomerang kids. And you'll find guidelines that help them work toward greater independence.


 


Look for your Stepping Stones next month for more information and a sneak peek of our cover!


 


 


 


Connect Often
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HerMentorCenter provides information, support and direction for women. We are here to support you as you nourish your family relationships.
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