1. Capitol Rioters Planned to Capture and Kill Lawmakers: DOJ

  COLD BLOOD 

For the first time, federal prosecutors have stated their view that the Trumpist mob failed in carrying out a plan to murder government officials.

2. QAnon Congresswoman: I Didn’t Guide Rioters Around Capitol

 ‘OFFENSIVE, SHAMEFUL’ 

Lauren Boebert (R-CO), a gun-rights obsessive who has voiced her interest in the baseless QAnon conspiracy theory, is furious about the allegations.

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3. Snag Yourself a 5G Smartphone for Under $300

 AD BY ONEPLUS 

The N10 and N100 are Android-powered smartphones that offer real bang-for-your-buck value.

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4. Biden Picks Ex-FDA Chief to Sort Out Sputtering Vax Rollout

 SHOOT YOUR SHOT 

David Kessler is a close ally of Anthony Fauci, and the two worked together in the 1990s to develop and approve drugs to fight the AIDS epidemic.

5. Capitol Cops Say Rioters Sprayed ‘Bear Mace’ in Their Faces

 THEY CAME PREPARED 

Officer Christina Laury said she was temporarily blinded by what is, basically, a super-strength pepper spray that can deter a grizzly.

6. This Celeb-Loved Face Mask Is Actually Worth the Hype

 FACE MASK FASHION 

The evolvetogether masks come in a variety of colors and two flexible sizes.

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7. Trump Bans Mention of Nixon as Aides Suggest Resigning: CNN

 NIXING RICHARD 

Trump said he can’t count on Mike Pence to pardon him like Gerald Ford, anyway.

8. Biden Postpones Inauguration Rehearsal Over Security Threats

 ON HIGH ALERT 

The president-elect’s train trip was also scrapped. The practice run is now scheduled for Monday.

9. Man Who Filmed Babbitt Shooting Charged With Joining Riot

 ‘OUR HOUSE, MOTHERF*CKERS!’ 

John Sullivan has insisted that he’s a journalist, but footage shows him screaming out at the Capitol: “We gotta get this sh*t burned... it’s our house motherf*ckers!”

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10. Trump Admin Executes Corey Johnson After COVID-19 Delay

 LETHAL INJECTION 

The execution went ahead late Thursday after a court overturned an earlier order allowing Johnson time to recover from COVID-19.

11. ‘QAnon Shaman’ Seeks Pardon From Trump for Capitol Riot

 ‘TRUMP’S INVITATION’ 

His attorney argues that he “accepted President Trump’s invitation to walk down Pennsylvania Avenue to the Capitol.”

12. Waitress Frees 11-Year-Old Boy From Horrific Abuse: Cops

 HERO 

An Orlando detective said the boy was “destined to be killed” if he had not been rescued.

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13. New York Dolls’ Sylvain Sylvain Dies at 69

 LEGEND 

“I can still remember the first time I saw him bop into the rehearsal space ... straight from the plane after having been deported from Amsterdam,” David Johansen wrote.

14. Trump Plans to Live at Mar-a-Lago and Bring Aides With Him

 SEASIDE RETREAT 

Trump’s “body man” plans to accompany him to Palm Beach.

15. White Pol Says Black People Are Glad Ancestors Were Enslaved

 ‘UNRELENTING BUFFOONERY’ 

North Dakota state Rep. Terry Jones made the outrageous comment while pushing a bill that would designate American as a race.

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