1. 14 GOPers Sign Letter Demanding Biden Undergo Cognitive Test

  BRAIN DRAIN 

Former Trump doctor Rep. Ronny Jackson (R-TX) is demanding that Biden undergo a cognitive fitness test.

2. 2-Year-Old Killed, 9-Year-Old Wounded on Detroit Highway

 PLAGUE OF VIOLENCE 

The Detroit police chief called the shooter, who is still at large, “a monster.”

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3. BACARDÍ Is Bringing The Pride Party To You This June

 AD BY BACARDI 

Cheers to Pride with this BACARDÍ Pride Cocktail Courier Kit! The Pride party will be delivered to your doorstep with flavorful cocktails that will make any celebration special.

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4. Zack Snyder Ends Debate Over Batman, Catwoman, and Oral Sex

 ‘CANON’ 

DC Comics had blocked a scene of the caped crusader performing oral sex on Catwoman from an upcoming series.

5. Brown Bear Rampages in Japan, Attacks Military Barracks

 TERRIFYING 

Four people were injured before the bear was shot dead.

6. Hard Pants? I’ll Be Wearing These Everlane Joggers Forever

 SOFT PANTS, PLEASE 

Who needs jeans? These Everlane Joggers are the best pants I’ve found.

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7. Daredevil Biker Killed Trying to Breaking World Jump Record

 TRAGIC 

Alex Harvill crashed into a dirt berm and was thrown over the handlebars.

8. Americans Shun Johnson & Johnson COVID Vaccine

 WHAT A WASTE 

Millions of doses will probably expire before they can be used in the U.S.

9. Portland Police Crowd Control Unit Quits En Masse

 WALKOUT 

The officers gave up their spots on the specialized unit after a fellow officer was indicted for striking a protester last year. They will remain on the force, however.

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10. Police Ask Public to Be ‘Vigilant’ After Body Parts Found

 KEEP AN EYE OUT 

“We have not recovered all of the parts necessary,” a Minneapolis police spokesman said during an evening press conference.

11. 3 Dead, 2 Missing After Tubers Go Over North Carolina Dam

 HORROR ON THE RIVER 

Four tubers were rescued alive.

12. Woman Arrested After Bomb Threat at NJ Naval Weapons Station

 NITRO NISSAN 

The driver had already been banned from the Naval Weapons Station Earle.

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13. Team USA Will Bring Its First Trans Athlete to Tokyo

 ‘READY TO SHRED’ 

Chelsea Wolfe will serve as an alternate on the BMX team.

14. Educator Made Child Porn—and Blamed It on His 9-Year-Old Son

 ‘REAL PIECE OF CRAP’ 

Tim Clevenger secretly filmed his daughter’s friends while they were in the bathroom at his home.

15. 1 Killed, 12 Injured in Shooting Spree Near Phoenix

 OUT OF CONTROL 

The suspect was taken into custody shortly after the string of shootings.

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