1.  Trump Raged Over Bunker Story: Leaker ‘Should Be Executed’

 PERFECTLY NORMAL 

Trump and his family were whisked away to the bunker last year after racial justice protests erupted outside the White House.

2.  Musk’s Testy Day in Court Interrupted by Vomiting Lawyer

  OBJECTION 

The court went on recess for two hours after a member of the plaintiffs’ counsel puked in the jury box.

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3.  Cheers to Summer With Bacardí Cocktails

 AD BY BACARDI 

Celebrate this summer with Bacardí’s Cocktail Courier Kit! The party will be delivered right to your doorstep with flavorful cocktails that make any celebration special.

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4.  Judge Agrees to Free QAnon Rioter Who Chased Capitol Cop

 ‘POSTER BOY’ 

A federal judge agreed to release Douglas Jensen on house arrest, calling it a “close case.”

5.  Woman Shopping for Free Panties Films Wild ‘Karen’ Encounter

 BRIEFS BRAWL 

Ijeoma Ukenta filmed a white woman lunging at her then begging her not to film.

6.  I Don’t Leave the House Without This Super Sunscreen

 SAVING FACE 

Wearing sunscreen can keep your skin healthy years down the line, and Dr. Loretta’s Urban Antioxidant Sunscreen also makes you look good right now.

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7.  Gov. Abbott Says Texas Dems Who Fled State Will be Arrested

 FUGITIVES 

More than 50 state House Democrats fled the D.C. on Monday night to deny Republicans a quorum to advance a new bill on voting restrictions.

8.  Surfside Condo’s Concrete Slab Had Been Problem for 25 Years

 CRUMBLING 

A 1996 permit for “concrete structural repairs” indicated that the pool deck’s issues had long plagued the Champlain Towers South.

9.  Jenna Ellis Quits GOP for Not Backing Trump’s Election Lies

 GIVE IT A WEEK 

Ellis made her declaration on Real America’s Voice, saying she’s done with the party until it “decides that it wants to be conservative again.”

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10.  Taco Bell Worker Charged After Fireworks Set Store on Fire

 HATE TO SEE IT 

A group of employees set off a firework in a trashcan, then accidentally locked themselves out of the store as it went up in smoke.

11.  Boeing Discloses New Issue With 787 Dreamliners

  NOSEDIVE 

The news comes at a time when the company has worked to rectify issues from their 737 Max plane.

12.  Trump Pick Who Vowed to Ignore Firing Whines: I Can’t Log In

 ACCESS DENIED 

Andrew Saul threatened that he’d continue his work after being fired from the Social Security Administration by the Biden administration.

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13.  Nickelodeon Actress Quits TikTok for ‘Mocking’ Black Dancers

 ‘SORRY YOU WERE OFFENDED’ 

“This kind of hate needs to evaporate from the planet no matter who it’s towards,” Shaw said in a video.

14.  Newsom Won’t Be a Dem on Recall Ballot After Filing Screw-Up

 PAPER FAIL 

A judge said he missed a firm deadline to list his party affiliation.

15.  Russian Hackers Behind Massive Ransomware Attack Go Dark

 DISRUPTED 

The hackers behind the latest ransomware spree ran into a little hiccup Tuesday: They couldn’t get online.

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