The European Championships has a big problem: how are they going to fit 3,000,000 Turks inside the Olympiastadion (capacity 74,475) for their quarter-final against the Netherlands on Saturday? Germany hosts the largest Turkish diaspora in the world, making the likes of Berlin, Munich and Cologne – just to name a few – glorious melting pots. No wonder Lukas Podolski opened his own chain of kebab shops in the country. The former Arsenal forward is now worth £180m thanks to Mangal Doner, where you can get a Podolski sandwich for less than £7.

Not only is there Turkish influence in Germany but also a little bit of Deutschland in Vincenzo Montella’s squad. Five players – Cenk Tosun, Hakan Calhanoglu, Salih Ozcan, Kenan Yildiz and Kaan Ayhan – were born in the country they are currently winning hearts and minds in. Merih Demiral might have scored twice to double his international tally but the real hero in their 2-1 victory over Austria was Mert Gunok who, in the final moments, dived to the right and produced one of the saves of the decade from a Christoph Baumgartner header, sparking wild celebrations from Leipzig to Istanbul and Dalston to Gaziantep. Everyone sprinted to celebrate with their new hero at full-time, knowing that he had saved the nation (and the diaspora). If Podolski, who played three seasons in Turkey, has managed to name a kebab after himself, surely Gunok deserves at least a shop in his honour.

When the odds are against them, the Turkish come to the fore. Everyone had Austria as outright favourites, but within a minute of the match Montella’s side were proving them wrong. Where the country further seems to excel is in being able to sneak pyrotechnics inside stadiums, regardless of security levels and finger wagging from suits. It feels like whenever a Turkey player wins a tackle red smoke billows from the stands to show there is no party without pyro. In Ankara and Istanbul there was a big screen set up for thousands to watch – if they could see through the Turkey flags being waved throughout the crowd, at least. There was even one man in the capital watching with a parrot on his shoulder. No parrot, no party.

“Besides our formation, our gameplan and our tactics I saw Turkish heart today, and that’s what I love about this country,” whooped Montella, who must now prepare for their last-eight encounter without midfielder Orkun Kokcu – a former Dutch captain at youth level – because he is sat on the suspension naughty step for too many bookings. Kokcu is further evidence of the reach Turkey has across the world. Whatever happens on Saturday night, the tournament has been the richer for it, but if they do manage to down Ronald Koeman and co, the pyros and car horns will be seen and heard across the continent and beyond.

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In the dressing room there’s a bit of music, maybe we’ll have a drink … when you lose you feel bad, so it’s nice to win” – Donyell Malen shows the Dutch still have that liberal streak as he suggests the squad might get on the Tin after their 3-0 win over Romania.

Euro 2024 peaked last night. Thanks Turkey and Austria!” – Krishna Moorthy.

Can I put in a plea to give our brave England lads a break please? Part one – Slovenia: when we didn’t score against them it was because we were rubbish, with rubbish players and a rubbish manager who should have dealt with lowly Slovenia easily but didn’t because – you know, rubbish. When Portugal didn’t score against Slovenia it was because Slovenia are obdurate masters of defence on the back of a nine-game unbeaten streak, and are actually really hard to break down. Surely the same Slovenia played both games? Give our lads a break! Part two – Slovakia: nobody yet has highlighted the unbelievable odds we were up against in the Slovakia game when talking about our famous victory. Firstly, Slovakia were playing in blue shirts, and secondly the game was taking place on ITV. Double kryptonite for England teams. Give Gareth’s brave soldiers a break!” – Pete Smith.

Cristiano Ronaldo seems to think that calling himself CR7 reminds people he was the football equivalent of a supercar. CR7 sounds like a pokey but aggressively styled and overpriced crossover sport-utility vehicle aimed at dads who don’t want to be seen driving a minivan. On second thought, it’s perfect” – Mark Matics.

Send letters to the.boss@theguardian.com. Today’s letter o’ the day winner is … Mark Matics, who wins a copy of Euro Summits: The Story of the Uefa European Championships 1960 to 2016, by Pitch Publishing. Visit their bookshop here. Terms and conditions for our competitions can be viewed here.

Georgia were given one hell of a welcome home after their heroic efforts at the Euros. “Today is a miracle, I want such a Georgia – happy with the miracle of these boys,” cheered president Salome Zurabishvil. “But miracles don’t come like that. This is hard work, dedication, talent, attitude, professionalism, teamwork, love for the country, and they have combined all this in such a way that they have achieved the unattainable, and this is only the beginning.”

Uefa is investigating Merih Demiral after he allegedly made a so-called “wolf’s salute” gesture linked to the Turkish nationalist movement during celebrations against Austria. “The symbols of right-wing extremists have no place in our stadiums,” said German interior minister Nancy Faeser.

Austria coach Ralf Rangnick knows his team left one out there after that defeat to Turkey. “Four entertaining games, super intense – I saw games that were difficult to stay awake for, but that is not the case with us,” he whooped. “This was a historic chance to win, to go to the quarter-final. I cannot believe we’re going home today. We thought that we would continue our journey here.”

Red-hot news from the England camp: all 26 players are running around. Yes, even Luke Shaw. It’s coming home.

Slovakia boss Francesco Calzona has blamed Declan Rice for causing fresh and funky scenes at the end of England’s 2-1 win. “Rice was standing close to the referees, I wanted to ask the reason for the lack of added time considering the time-wasting done by the English,” he blathered to Sky Sport Italia. “He shouted at me and I replied in a similar tone. He shouldn’t have been there acting like a bodyguard for the referee. He could’ve avoided that.”

And spare a thought for the Czech Republic’s Michal Sadilek, who missed the Euros after knacking himself in an ill-timed go-kart accident and has now confirmed he won’t be fit for the start of FC Twente’s season. “I want to look ahead and recover as best as possible,” sniffed the midfielder. “I want to thank the players, the staff and the club for the support I have received in recent weeks, that has done me good.”

Barney Ronay on the destabilising charisma in England’s squad. Yes, alpha-energy’s Jude Bellingham does get a mention.

Fix the left flank and stop arguing: the things England must sort out! By Jacob Steinberg.

It is getting harder for players – at the Euros or otherwise – to survive the social media abusers, writes Jason Stockwood.

Arda Guler conducted Turkey’s greatest night in a generation. Jonathan Liew was watching – and writing.

And what are the most one-sided penalty shootouts at major tournaments? The Knowledge knows.

Chelsea are set to sign England right-back Lucy Bronze and Spain’s whizzy youth international midfielder Júlia Bartel, both from Barcelona on freebies.

Stop us if you think you’ve heard this one before dept: Bayern Munich have agreed to sign Fulham midfielder João Palhinha in a deal worth up to £47.4m.

Iliman Ndiaye has become Everton’s third signing of the summer after completing a a £16.9m move from Marseille.

West Ham have had a £25m bid for Nice defender Jean-Clair Todibo volleyed back at them.

The attendance at Arne Slot’s first Liverpool training session has been boosted after Wataru Endo and Mohamed Salah confirmed they won’t be going to Big Sports Day 2024 as overage players with Japan and Egypt, respectively.

And disappointing results, heart disturbances and astrological accusations have led to Igor Stimac’s sacking by India and incendiary statements. Want to know more? Then John Duerden has something for you.

This week our sister newsletter focusing on women’s football looks at the sad demise of Reading Women – and why we should have seen it coming. You can sign up to receive Moving the Goalposts here.

Fourteen years ago … it was a crazy plan and it was never going to work. Still, at least Diego Maradona got to manage Argentina at a World Cup. It was on this day in 2010 that Germany’s 4-0 crushing of a team in which Javier Mascherano was asked to be a one-man midfield ended El Diego’s tenure. Lionel Messi, already the planet’s best player and Maradona’s true heir, managed to score zero goals in South Africa, despite having a record 29 shots. The deadlock was broken in Cape Town by 20-year-old Thomas Müller, now the owner of 10 World Cup goals but still yet to register one at the Euros in 15 matches. Müller is in Germany’s squad for Euro 2024, and will hope to break that duck against Spain on Friday.