| Talk about show and tell, doing your opposing manager’s team talk for him. On Saturday, while Ange Postecoglou prepared Tottenham for their tea-time kick-off, the Etihad was staging a celebration of Rodri’s Ballon d’Or, Ballon d’Or, Ballon d’Or that WWE would have been proud of. Only the great man’s knee-knack prevented him doing the full Vince McMahon power strut down the red carpet. There it was in huge gold letters, the answer to Tottenham’s prayers, the name of the man that City are lacking, and will continue to lack, Rodri. Spurs duly won 4-0. A one-man team? Let’s not get silly now. Mateo Kovacic, holder of four Big Cup winners’ medals, was also missing. An old team? Perhaps we’re getting closer since in the five-game losing run that has Pep Guardiola rubbing his cranium like he’s polishing an unearthed Roman coin, there has been much creaking. Worse, a lot of pointing. A true giveaway sign of the ageing pro is asking others to do as I say, not what I do as my legs can’t get me there. If Kyle Walker being shown a clean pair of heels by Timo Werner was the meme, there were plenty more moments of dither and delay that just a month ago were unthinkable. A clear-out required? That’s what a few City fans are calling for, though some of the young ‘uns haven’t been spared: Rico Lewis, Josko Gvardiol and Savinho came under fire, too. So then, Pep, what’s the solution here? To use the phrasing of former City utility man, Fabian Delph, time to go back to the “basics of football”. Remember when, in the first of those many documentaries City pump out, Delph advised his teammates on “winning our individual battles, sticking together as a unit, [eff]ing defenders defending, midfielders box-to-box, [eff] keepers making saves”? Remember how Pep shooed Delph away? Not so smart now, Catalan genius, the man who said: “I don’t train the tackles, what are tackles?” Perhaps it is the time for Guardiola, someone who publicly embraces English football traditions as his own, to go back to such basics. Time-honoured thinking, even among the managerial greats, your Fergies, your Paisleys, your Allardyces, your Pulises, was to get the defence sorted, lock down midfield and hope the striker scores one off his backside to arrest the slide. Work the channels, back and face, clear the danger. When in doubt, knock it out. Perhaps Delph, these days retired but very possibly available, might offer the likes of Ilkay Gündogan, Bernardo Silva and Kevin De Bruyne some handy hints on the midfielder’s art. Though as a team with no midfield, as highlighted by that Hollywood display of he who can’t play, why not get it launched to the big man, replace Juanma Lillo with Big Joe Royle, and call Niall Quinn in to give Erling Haaland some tips on flick-ons and holding the ball up down those channels? Micah Richards in to drill the defence? Let’s not get silly now. | 