1.  ‘Highest Penalty Available’: Facebook Boots Trump for 2 Yrs

 BUH BYE 

The ban means Trump won’t be able to post through the 2022 election.

2.  Allen West Unexpectedly Resigns as Texas GOP Chairman

  CHANGE OF DIRECTION 

The far-right firebrand may be seeking public office, something West didn’t confirm or deny at a Friday press conference.

3.  These Stylish Hiking Boots Need No Break-in Time

 ONE STEP AT A TIME 

The K-6 Boot isn’t a new style for the brand—it first made its way to the Eddie Bauer catalog in 1964—but it was new for me.

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4.  ‘Giving Them Away’: Trump Condo Prices Crash to 10-Year Lows

 ‘IT’S EMBARRASSING’ 

“I have never seen buildings plummet so dramatically,” said one NYC real estate exec.

5.  ‘Drake and Josh’ Star Charged With ‘Endangering Children’

 ‘HARMFUL MATERIAL’ 

The conversations allegedly became sexual at times, according to a report.

6.  Dyson’s New Vacuum Lets Me Clean My Home Using Lasers

 SUCK IT UP  

The vacuum is the best one Dyson has ever made. Here’s why.

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7.  Who Is This Boy—and Who Killed Him?

 ‘LITTLE ZION’ 

Hikers found his body in the forest a week ago, and despite a $10,000 reward still cannot identify him.

8.  Sophie Turner on Pride: Time Isn’t Straight and Neither Am I

 BASKING IN PRIDE 

The actress’ Instagram Story post celebrated “bi pride.”

9.  Riot Suspect Who Cried ‘Pedophile’ Has Statutory-Rape Record

 IT TAKES ONE? 

Sean McHugh gave Capitol police a hard time, allegedly yelling “You guys like protecting pedophiles?...there is a Second Amendment behind us, what are you going to do then?”

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10.  Teen in Fatal Carjacking of Uber Driver Committed Until 21

 LOCKED UP 

The sentencing comes a day after her accomplice, a 13-year-old girl, pleaded guilty to second-degree murder.

11.  Alaska Airline’s Uniforms Unfair to Nonbinary Workers: ACLU

  ‘ANTIQUATED’ 

One flight attendant said the uniform policy often leads to them being misgendered at work.

12.  Putin Defends Capitol Rioters: They Had ‘Political Demands’

 PROUDEST BOY 

It comes days after Russia’s foreign minister said the Trumpist legions were facing “persecution.”

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13.  Exec, Cop Hit With 1,000 Years in Prison for Rigging Soccer

 LOTS OF TIME 

Sentences issued 10 years after a court convicted the president of Turkey’s Fenerbahce for match-fixing and rivals alleged a scheme tied to exiled spiritual leader Fethullah Gulen.

14.  Dad, 28, Killed by Single Punch From Road-Rage Suspect

 ‘REALLY HEAVY HIT’ 

Wei Lin turned up to the scene of a fender bender to help his employee, who didn’t speak English, communicate with the other driver.

15.  Head of German Catholic Church Offers Resignation to Pope

 MEA CULPA 

Cardinal Reinhard Marx has offered to step down over a troubling clerical sex scandal in the German church. Francis has not yet accepted the resignation.

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