Good Morning, Do! Today is Wednesday, October 21 I have a domain name, that you might be interested in: alien-encounters.com It is not really intended to be serious. The idea is to have fun making it a spoof on the UFO scare, or just have fun. With your OWN domain, nobody can censor you or put you into Facebook Jail. YOU are the boss! You can write your pages with the free Open Office WRITER or Microsoft Office WORD, and put in any of your pictures you want. You can add any ads you want. Once you have decent traffic, that can earn you some money. The International name registration is $15 per year, but you have to jump at it today! You don't necessarily have to pay today, just agree. I trust you and will pay the $15 for you until your check comes in. I am selling the domain name for $15, not $15 Million, just 15 bucks. The web hosting will cost you $2 per month. Totally negligible. GO FOR IT! ___________________________________________________ International Bonehead Award Kansas teacher charged in second child sex crime case _____________________________________________________ Today, October 20 in 1918 Margaret Owen set a typing speed record of 170 words per minute on a manual typewriter. WOW! _____________________________________________________ We need anything politically important rationed out like Pez: small, sweet, and coming out of a funny, plastic head. --- Dennis Miller _____________________________________________________ In bygone days, a thin man insulted a large man. The large man challenged his tormentor to a duel with pistols. On the day of the duel a debate ensued about the unfair advantage held by the thin man because he was a much smaller target. Finally the thin man came up with a solution. "Let the outline of my figure be chalked upon your body," he said to his opponent, "and any shots of mine that hit outside the chalk lines, we won't count." _____________________________________________________ That is a Crayfish in Australia. ___________________________________________________ >From Vera I overheard my father telling a family friend about my newly- assigned mission in the U.S. Coast Guard. I work on a cutter that escorts cruise ships and international vessels under the bridges in California's Bay Area. But what my father told his friend was, "She's involved in some sort of escort service." ___________________________________________________ An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Anthony Kuckelman, McLouth, Kansas, USA Kansas teacher charged in second child sex crime case A former northeast Kansas high school science teacher has been charged in a second child sex crime case. The Lawrence Journal-World reports that after the initial case was filed in May, Anthony Kuckelman was charged in a second case involving a different student with electronic solicitation of a minor, attempted unlawful sexual relations and promoting obscenity to minors. The student from the first case also has filed a civil case that was moved this week from state to federal court. The suit alleges that Kuckelman began sexually assaulting her when she was in his science class at McLouth High School. The lawsuit said that McLouth school district officials failed to protect the girl and had actual or constructive knowledge of Kuckelmans sexual harassment and assault of other female students. The complaint also alleges that staff members and students actively joked about a relationship between the teacher and the girl. McLouth Superintendent Steve Lilly said previously that Kuckelman was suspended after the district learned in May that he was being investigated. Lilly didnt respond to an email from the Journal- World seeking comment about the new case. DearWebby's Tech Support Pits From: Kerry RE: Parental control filters Dear Webby, What do recommend for parental control filters? Kerry Dear Kerry A sturdy marble or oak rolling pin seems to be the best. The software parental controls are way too soft. Most likely your kids can crack them a lot faster than you can set them up, plus they can always go to different but similar sites. Just hanging around now and then and making it clear that computer use is a privilege, that can be cut at any time, is the most effective. Kids will sneak a peek at taboo stuff anyway, just like you did. The general idea is to not make such a big fuss about it that it turns into an obsession. A good education about what lurks on the chat programs might go a lot further in protecting your kids than any software. You might also mention that if they get caught messing with a pedophile, they will be interrogated, mugshotted and fingerprinted, and mentioned in news and on the web. Quite embarrassing! Because kids, who have been victims of pedos often become pedos themselves, there are non-public records, that will make them prime suspects in the future. Like a tattoo on the forehead: PEDO You can also remind them how embarrassing it would be having to tell teachers and friends that their computer has been sold. Have FUN! DearWebby | If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! | If you like my work,
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_____________________________________________ Guards escorted a handcuffed prisoner into the courtroom where I stood as the court deputy. "Is this a tough judge?" the prisoner asked the baliff. The baliff replied, "Tough but fair." "Yeah?" continued the prisoner. "How tough?" "The toughest judge since Pontius Pilate," the baliff replied. The prisoner answered, "I don't know him. I'm not from around here." ____________________________________________ A new miracle doctor was in town. He could cure anything and anybody, and everyone was amazed with what he can do. Everyone except for Mr. Smith, the town grouch. So Mr. Smith went to this 'miracle doctor' to prove that he wasn't anybody special. So he goes and tells the doctor, "Hey, doc, I have lost my sense of taste. I can't taste nothin', so what are ya goin to do?" The doctor scratches his head and mumbles to himself a little, then tells Mr. Smith, "What you need is jar number 43." Jar number 43? Mr. Smith wonders. So the doctor brings the jar and tells Mr. Smith to taste it. He tastes it and immediately spits it out, "This is gross!" he yells. "I just restored your sense of taste Mr. Smith," says the doctor. So Mr. Smith goes home very mad. One month later, Mr. Smith goes back to the doctor along with a new problem, "Doc," he starts, "I can't remember!" Thinking he got the doctor, the doctor scratches his head and mumbles to himself a little and tells Mr. Smith, "What you need is jar number 43..." Before the doctor finished his sentence, Mr. Smith fled the town. ____________________________________________ Frank always looked on the bright side. He would constantly irritate his friends with his eternal optimism. No matter how horrible the circumstance, he would always reply, "It could have been worse." To cure him of his annoying habit, his friends decided to invent a situation so completely bad, so terrible, that even Frank could find no hope in it. On the golf course one day, one of them said, "Frank, did you hear about Tom? He came home last night, found his wife in bed with another man, shot them both and then turned the gun on himself!" "That's awful," said Frank, "But it could have been worse." "How in the hell," asked his bewildered friend, "Could it have been worse?" "Well," replied Frank, "If it happened the night before, I'd be dead now!" ____________________________________________ | Ophelia Dingbatter's NewsNo sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request. |
___________________________________________________ | Today October 21 in 1797 "Old Ironsides," the U.S. Navy frigate Constitution, was launched in Boston's harbor. 1805 The Battle of Trafalgar occurred off the coast of Spain. The British defeated the French and Spanish fleet. 1849 The first tattooed man, James F. O'Donnell, was put on exhibition at the Franklin Theatre in New York City, NY. 1858 The Can-Can was performed for the first time in Paris. 1879 Thomas Edison invented the electric incandescent lamp. It would last 13 1/2 hours before it would burn out. 1917 The first U.S. soldiers entered combat during World War I near Nancy, France. 1918 Margaret Owen set a typing speed record of 170 words per minute on a manual typewriter. 1925 The photoelectric cell was first demonstrated at the Electric Show in New York City, NY. 1925 The U.S. Treasury Department announced that it had fined 29,620 people for prohibition (of alcohol) violations. 1927 In New York City, construction began on the George Washington Bridge. 1944 During World War II, the German city of Aachen was trashed and captured by U.S. troops. 1945 Women in France were allowed to vote for the first time. 1950 Chinese forces invaded Tibet. 1959 The Guggenheim Museum was opened to the public in New York. The building was designed by Frank Lloyd Wright. 1967 Thousands of Communist demonstrators marched in Washington, DC, in opposition to the Vietnam War. 1983 The Pentagon reported that 2,000 Marines were headed to Grenada to protect and evacuate Americans living there. 1986 The U.S. ordered 55 Soviet diplomats to leave. The action was in reaction to the Soviet Union expelling five American diplomats. 1991 Jesse Turner, an American hostage in Lebanon, was released after nearly five years of being imprisoned. 1994 North Korea and the U.S. signed an agreement requiring North Korea to halt its nuclear program and agree to inspections. 2003 The U.S. Senate voted to ban what was known as partial birth abortions. 2003 North Korea rejected U.S. President George W. Bush's offer of a written pledge not to attack in exchange for the communist nation agreeing to end its nuclear weapons program. 2020 Do smiled. |
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