Good Morning, Do! Today is Friday, August 23 Time to wear a bit of red to show your support for the troops! _____________________________________________________ Today, August 23 in 1962 The first live TV program was relayed between the U.S. and Europe through the U.S. Telstar satellite. More of today in history at History ______________________________________________________ | If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! | |
Today's Bonehead Award: Cardinal George Pell loses appeal against conviction for child sex abuse _______________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! _______________________________________________ Writing is the only profession where no one considers you ridiculous if you earn no money. --- Jules Renard (1864 - 1910) Whenever you hear the consensus of scientists agrees on something or other, reach for your wallet, because you're being had. --- Michael Crichton, Gullible Warming is a good example of that. _______________________________________________ A kindly 90-year-old grandmother found buying presents for family and friends a bit much one Christmas, so she wrote out checks for all of them to put in their Christmas cards. In each card she wrote, "Buy your own present" and then sent them off. To make sure that each and every one of them remembered to visit her, she "forgot" to sign the checks. ________________________________________________` _____________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! Thanks for your votes! ___________________________________________________ Reported by Trish in Australia An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Cardinal George Pell, 78, in jail Australia Cardinal George Pell loses appeal against conviction for child sex abuse Former Vatican treasurer George Pell will remain in prison after an Australian appeals court rejected the disgraced cardinal's appeal against his conviction for sexually assaulting two 13-year- old choirboys in the mid-1990s. The most senior Catholic official to be convicted of child sexual assault, Pell was sentenced in March to six years in prison, with a non-parole period of three years and eight months, for an attack described by Chief Judge Peter Kidd as "breathtakingly arrogant." Lawyers for the 78-year-old cardinal immediately appealed his conviction, and in June presented 13 "solid obstacles" to a guilty verdict on all five charges, including that it was "not possible" for Pell to be alone while robed after Sunday mass and for no one to notice the boys were missing at that time. On Wednesday, the appeals court rejected that submission, accepting that it was possible for the jury to have found Pell guilty beyond reasonable doubt, based on the evidence presented at Pell's five-week trial last December. DearWebby's Tech Support Pits From: Irene Re: Filters versus Blacklists Dear Webby, My grand daughter told me that you had written that blacklists are obsolete. If they are obsolete, why does every spam control program have one built in? Irene Dear Irene Blacklisting spam is obsolete, because spammers either fake the sender address, or use yours forged in as the sender. The only purpose left for blacklists is KNOWN undesirables. If you do not want to receive mail from certain relatives or acquaintances, then you can put them into the blacklist. Filters are much more efficient in eliminating spam. Have FUN! DearWebby Automatically move ALL your settings and programs. "I CAN HEAR JUST FINE!" Three retirees, each with a hearing loss, were playing golf one fine March day. One remarked to the other, "Windy, isn't it?" "No," the second man replied, "it's Thursday." And the third man chimed in, "So am I. Let's have a beer." | If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! | |
Thanks to Sandie for this story: The generation gap proved glaringly obvious at the mail-order music company where my wife works as a customer service representative. Some college students, who were working part-time inputting customer information, wrote the following notes regarding some golden oldies: "Customer is looking for two song titles: 'Shovel Off Two Buffaloes' and 'Honey, Suck a Rose.'" ___________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Thriftyfun.com Sifting Dry Ingredients If you don't have a sifter but a recipe calls for sifting ingredients, put the dry ingredients in a mixing bowl and stir well with a whisk. thriftyfun.Com ____________________________________________________ ___________________________________________________ A recent bride called her mother one evening in tears. "Oh, Mom, I tried to make Grandmother's meat loaf for dinner tonight, and it's just awful! I followed the recipe exactly, and I know I have the recipe right because it's the one you gave me. But it just didn't come out right, and I'm so upset. I wanted this to be so special for George because he loves meat loaf. What could have gone wrong?" Her mother replied soothingly, "Well, dear, let's go through the recipe. You read it out loud and tell me exactly what you did at each step, and together we'll figure it out." "OK," the bride sniffled. "Well, it starts out, ' Take fifty cents worth of ground beef . . . '" ___________________________________________________ My sister Tammy went through knee surgery a few weeks ago. I called her to see how she was doing. My nephew Bryan answered the phone. "Hello?" he whispered. "Hey, B, how's your mama?" "She's sleeping," he whispered again. "She go back to the doctor for a checkup?" "Yeah. She got some medicine," he said softly. "She's doing ok." "All right. Don't wake her up. Just tell her I called. What are you doing, by the way?" Again, softly, "Practicing on my drums." ___________________________________________________ Joe woke himself up with a loud "Hi There!" to someone in his dream. As the next day came and went, Joe thought the nocturnal outburst was his alone to remember. But that night, as he and Margaret were getting ready for bed, she said dryly, "If you see anyone you know tonight, just wave." __________________________________________________ | Ophelia Dingbatter's NewsNo sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request. |
___________________________________________________ | Today, August 23 in 1839 Hong Kong was taken by the British in a war with China. 1858 "Ten Nights in a Barroom" opened in New York City at the National Theater. It was a melodrama about the evils of drinking. 1892 The printed streetcar transfer was patented by John H. Stedman. 1902 Fannie Merrit Farmer opened her cooking school, Miss Farmer's School of Cookery, in Boston, MA. 1904 Hard D. Weed patented the grip-tread tire chain for cars. 1914 Tsingtao, China, was bombarded as Japan declared war on Germany in World War I. 1939 Nazi Germany and the Soviet Union signed a non-aggression treaty. 1944 During World War II, Romanian prime minister Ion Antonescue was dismissed. Soon after the country would abandon the Axis and join the obviously winning Allies. 1944 Marseilles was captured by Allied troops during World War II. 1952 The security pact of the Arab League went into effect. 1959 In the Peanuts comic strip, Sally debuted as an infant. 1962 The first live TV program was relayed between the U.S. and Europe through the U.S. Telstar satellite. 1979 Soviet dancer Alexander Godunov defected while the Bolshoi Ballet was on tour in New York City. 1982 The parliament of Lebanon elected Bashir Bemayel president. He was assassinated three weeks later. 1990 President Saddam Hussein appeared on Iraqi state television with a group of Western detainees that he referred to as "guests." He told the group that they were being held "to prevent the scourge of war." 1993 It was confirmed by Los Angeles police that Michael Jackson was the subject of a criminal investigation. 1996 U.S. President Clinton imposed limits on peddling cigarettes to children. 1998 Protestors in Sudan carried a sign that bore the resemblance of Monica Lewinsky and the words "No War for Monika." The anti- U.S. demonstration was in Khartoum, Sudan. 1998 Boris Yeltsin dismissed the Russian government again. 1999 Rescuers in Turkey found a young boy that had been buried in rubble from an earthquake for about a week. 1999 Robert Bogucki was rescued after getting lost in the Great Sandy Desert of Australia on July 11. During the 43 day ordeal Bogucki lost 44 pounds. 2019 Do smiled. |
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