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 Dear Webby's Humor Letter
widely read, forwarded, copied and imitated daily since 1994
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Clean humor and tech tips, updated daily! The Dear Webby Humor Letter is still
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Good Morning, Do,
Today is Friday, September 8
Time to wear a bit of red to show your support for the troops!
Thank you, Leon!!
Thank you Donnie!!
Have Fun!
Dearwebby
Todays Bonehead Award:
Florida driver more than 4 times over the limit
Bonehead
______________________________________________________
Today, Sept 8 in
1664 The Dutch surrendered New Amsterdam to the British,
who then renamed it New York.
See More of what happened on this day in history.
______________________________________________________
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter,
please donate what you can!


______________________________________________________
A short saying oft contains much wisdom.
--- Sophocles (496 BC - 406 BC)
The marvel of all history is the patience with which men
and women submit to burdens unnecessarily laid upon them
by their governments.
--- William H. Borah
______________________________________________________
If you like the Humor Letter, please vote!
______________________________________________________
One day a sweet little girl becomes puzzled about her
origin.
"How did I get here, Mommy?" she asks.
Her mother replies, using a well-worn phrase, "Why God sent
you, Honey."
"And did God send you too, Mommy?" she continues.
"Yes, Sweetheart, he did."
"And Daddy, and Grandma and Grandpa, and their moms and
dads, too?"
"Yes, Honey, all of them, too."
The child shakes her head in disbelief. "Then you're telling
me there's been no sex in this family for over 200 years? No
wonder everyone is so grouchy!"
_____________________________________________________


______________________________________________________
At the counter, a woman was complaining about the
departure time, saying, "Young man, I could stick a
feather in my butt and get there faster."
The clerk smiled and said, "Yeah, and you'd save extra
time by not having to go through Security! Go for it!"
______________________________________________________


_____________________________________________________
If you like the Humor Letter, please vote!
Thanks for your votes!
______________________________________________________
An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD
has been earned by
Jasbir, 67,
Bhupinder, 61,
Devbir Kalsi, 33,
Hillsborogh,
Florida
Parents flew from India to Florida
to help their son beat up his wife
A husband and wife are accused of flying from India to
Florida to help discipline their son's wife, who was found
badly beaten and allegedly held against her will at a Tampa
Bay area home on Saturday, law enforcement authorities said.
Jasbir Kalsi, 67, and Bhupinder Kalsi, 61, were arrested
along with their son, Devbir Kalsi, 33, after the victim's
relatives in India requested a welfare check by the
Hillsborough County Sheriff's Office, according to an
incident report.
A deputy who went to the victim's Riverview home around 6:30
a.m. on Saturday said people inside ignored his efforts to
get them to open the front door. He forced his way inside
when he heard Devbir's 33-year-old wife screaming for
someone to save her and her child.
The deputy forced the door open and was immediately
confronted by the victim's husband Devbir Kalsi who
attempted to push the door closed, according to the
incident report.
The deputy said he was arresting the husband when he was
confronted by the man's father and mother. As the officer
dealt with the parents, additional deputies arrived.
The young wife was described as badly beaten and bruised
over her entire body. (HuffPost is not naming her because
she is a suspected victim of domestic violence.) Based on
her bruises, the woman is believed to have been physically
assaulted for an extended period of time, authorities
said.
They said the child, a 1-year-old according to the Tampa Bay
Times, was unharmed.
Devbir Kalsi's parents flew to Florida from Punjab state,
India, to help counsel and discipline his wife after
hearing that she was being disobedient, authorities
alleged. At one point, the husband and his parents allegedly
threatened his wife with a knife to her throat. They also
allegedly took her phone away so she couldn't call 911.
Devbir, Jasbir and Bhupinder Kalsi were booked into the
Hillsborough County Jail and held without bond, the Tampa
Bay Times reported.
Devbir is facing charges of felony battery, false
imprisonment, child abuse and denying access to 911.
His father is facing charges of aggravated battery with a
deadly weapon, false imprisonment, child abuse and denying
access to 911. His mother is looking at charges of battery,
domestic violence and failure to report child abuse.
The accused family members, who are foreign nationals, could
be deported back to India, Fox 13 reported.
_________________________________
Tech Support Pits
From: Ginger
Re: Desktop.ini
Dear Webby,
This "desktop.ini icon" has been showing up on my desktop
every time I sign onto my computer. I ignored it for weeks
and weeks but it's getting on my nerves now! Can you tell
me how to keep it from showing up every day?
Thank you for always being there when we have a question!
Ginger
Dear Ginger
It is a harmless, though rather klutzy way to show the
desktop setup.
Theoretically, the programmers of Windows could mess with
the desktop by editing it. In actuality, it is a leftover
from Windows 95, and nobody knows why.
If you delete it, it will be generated again the next time
you move icons around.
There is no need for it to clutter up your desktop. So just
hide the silly thing.
Select the icon or file or folders you want to hide.
Right-click and choose Properties.
Click the General tab.
Click the checkbox next to Hidden in the Attributes section.
Click Apply
That's all there is to it.
Have FUN!
DearWebby
Q. According to Cosmo magazine, if you meet a stranger at
a party and you think that he is attractive, is it okay to
come out and ask him if he's married?
A. Rose Marie: No, wait until morning.
Q. Which of your five senses tends to diminish as you get
older?
A. Charley Weaver: My sense of decency.
Q. In Hawaiian, does it take more than three words to say
"I Love You"?
A. Vincent Price: No, you can say it with a pineapple and a
twenty.
Q. What are "Do It," "I Can Help," and "I Can't Get Enough"?
A. George Gobel: I don't know, but it's coming from the
next apartment
If you can help with the cost of the
Humor Letter, please donate what you can!


Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com
Instant Wonton Noodles
By 15mhhm15 [242 Posts, 700 Comments]
While grocery shopping at Costco, these Chicken & Cilantro
Mini Wontons were being demonstrated. I love the idea of how
quick and versatile these wontons are for frozen food,
pretty nutritious, and inexpensive. This 3 lb bag has about
150 pieces for $9.69. There was a promotion going on so it
was $3.50 off, coming out to be $6.19.
Prep Time: 2 minutes
Cook Time: 8 minutes
Total Time: 10 minutes
Yield: 2 people
Ingredients:
25 wontons
1/2 water
2 packages ramen noodles
2 stems cilantro
2 stems green onions
4 pieces ham
4 Tbsp hoisin sauce
Steps:
Dice green onions and cilantro.
In a large pot, bring water to a boil. Add wontons and cook
for 2-3 minutes.
Remove wontons and set aside. Add ramen seasoning. I used
garlic and pepper kind of ramen. Sprinkle some green onions
in.
Add the ramen noodles and cook for 3-4 minutes
Optional: we had left over ham and a great way to use up ham
is in soup.
For finishing touches, add the wontons back into soup and
the remaining green onions and add cilantro. Stir in some
hoisin sauce for flavor and ready to enjoy!
____________________________________________________


Planting
donut seeds
____________________________________________________
>From Carole
Webby, I have to agree with Connie completely. You do more
to help people just by keeping them happy.
Thank you,
Carole
___________________________________________________
The 2017 World Beard and Mustache Champions.
___________________________________________________
A man comes home chuckling, and says to his wife,
"Get this, that ridiculous janitor of ours claims he's made
love to every woman in this building except one."
"Hmmmmm," said the wife, looking thoughtfully off into
space. "Must be that stuck up Fran Beasly on the
fourth floor."
Ophelia Dingbatter's
News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes
and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you
subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request.
____________________________________________________
Although I had never met my maternal grandfather, I knew
that he had been five feet, six inches tall, while my
stately grandmother stood five feet, eleven inches.
As a teen-ager while leafing through an old photograph
album with my Grandmother, I finally realized how unusual
they must have looked together.
"Grand," I asked, "how could you have dated and fallen in
love a man almost half a foot shorter than you?"
She turned to me, gave me a sensuous wink and said,
"Honey, we fell in love sitting down, and by the time I
stood up, it was way too late for him."
____________________________________________________
Today, Sept 8, in
1565 A Spanish expedition established the first permanent
European settlement in North America at present-day St.
Augustine, FL.
1664 The Dutch surrendered New Amsterdam to the British, who
then renamed it New York.
1866 The first recorded birth of sextuplets took place in
Chicago, IL. The parents were James and Jennie Bushnell.
1892 An early version of "The Pledge of Allegiance" appeared
in "The Youth's Companion."
1893 In New Zealand, the Electoral Act 1893 was passed by
the Legislative Council. It was consented by the governor on
September 19 giving all women in New Zealand the right to
vote.
1935 U.S. Senator Huey P. Long, "The Kingfish" of Louisiana
politics, was shot and mortally wounded. He died two days
later.
1945 In Washington, DC, a bus equipped with a two-way radio
was put into service for the first time.
1945 Bess Myerson of New York was crowned Miss America. She
was the first Jewish contestant to win the title.
1951 A peace treaty with Japan was signed by 48 other
nations in San Francisco, CA.
1960 NASA's Marshall Space Flight Center in Huntsville, AL,
was dedicated by U.S. President Dwight D. Eisenhower. The
facility had been activated in July earlier that year.
1966 NBC-TV aired the first episode of "Star Trek" entitled
"The Man Trap". The show was canceled on September 2, 1969.
1974 U.S. President Ford granted an unconditional pardon to
former U.S. President Nixon.
1975 In Boston, MA, public schools began their court-ordered
citywide busing program amid scattered incidents of
violence.
1997 America Online acquired CompuServe.
1999 Russia's Mission Control switched off the Mir space
station's central computer and other systems to save energy
during a planned six months of unmanned flights.
2015 British researchers announced that evidence of a larger
version of Stonehenge had been located about 2 miles from
the Stonehenge location. There were 90 buried stones that
had been found by ground penetrating radar.
2017 Do smiled.


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Well,
Do
, that's all for today.
Have FUN !
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