Good Morning, Do, Today is Monday, December 25 Merry Christmas! Dearwebby Todays Bonehead Award: Car jackers caught thanks to navigation system Bonehead ______________________________________________________ Today, December 25 in 1223 St. Francis of Assisi assembled one of the first Nativity scenes, in Greccio, Italy. See More of what happened on this day in history. ______________________________________________________ | If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! | |
______________________________________________________ How hard it is, sometimes, to trust the evidence of one's senses! How reluctantly the mind consents to reality. --- Norman Douglas ______________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! ______________________________________________________ Several weeks after Christmas, I stopped by my sister's house and my 7 year old nephew greeted me with, "Thanks for the Sea Scout Signal Whistle you gave me for Christmas! It's the best present I ever got." "That's great, Did you learn how to pipe any signals on it?" "Oh, I don't play with it," the little guy said. "My mom gives me a dollar a day not to blow it during the day and my dad gives me five dollars a week not to blow it at night." _____________________________________________________ Anni got a part time job in a local restaurant to pick up a little spare change. She was concerned about being able to carry the heavy trays and serve from them but a co-worker explained that there were tray stands placed throughout the restaurant. A nervous Anni served all the lunches successfully last Saturday utilizing every stand he could find. Afterward Anni was concerned about an elderly couple that had finished some time ago and paid their check, but remained sitting at the table. When Anni asked if everything had been all right, the man said quietly, " Yes, It was fine, dear," , "but my wife and I would like to leave now and we were wondering if she could please have her walker back?" _____________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ ____________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! Thanks for your votes! _____________________________________________________ When the famous politician and orator William Jennings Bryan (1860-1925) was a young man, he went to the home of the father of his prospective wife to ask him for her hand in marriage. Bryan was determined to impress the father by quoting from the Bible, and he chose Proverbs 18:22: "He who finds a wife finds a good thing, And obtains favor from the LORD." Bryan was unnerved when the father replied by quoting Paul: "So then he that giveth her in marriage doeth well; but he that giveth her not in marriage doeth better." (1 Corinthians 7:38) Bryan, never at a loss for words, said: "Yes, but Paul had no wife and Solomon had 700. Therefore, I believe Solomon ought to be the better judge as to marriage." _____________________________________________________ An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Christopher Bellamy, 25, of West Palm Beach Elias Evans, 19, of Riviera Beach, Floriduh Car jackers arrested Two men are being held without bond at the Palm Beach County Jail after they allegedly carjacked a man of a vehicle he had just purchased, according to an arrest report. Christopher Bellamy, 25, of West Palm Beach and Elias Evans, 19, of Riviera Beach are each facing charges of carjacking with a firearm and robbery with a firearm. The carjacking victim, who is 22 and from Lantana, was forced at gunpoint Friday to give up his 2009 BMW, his gold teeth, a belt and $143 in cash, the report said. A passenger in the BMW was robbed of $20 and an iPhone. The passenger, a 17-year-old boy, told Riviera Beach police he was contacted by a man he knows only as Deandre to hang out on the 1100 block of West 23rd Street, just north of Blue Heron Boulevard. After about 30 minutes, the 17- year-old called his friend, the BMW owner, to pick him up, the report said. As the BMW was pulling away, Deandre knocked on a rear window and asked for a ride to the store. He got into the car along with Bellamy and Evans, the report said. Deandre then allegedly pulled a gun and put it in the driver's face. This is how it is going to go down, Deandre told the driver. After robbing the driver and passenger, the three men jumped into the BMW and left. The vehicle was equipped with a navigation system that allowed police to track its location. Riviera Beach police, assisted by West Palm Beach police, arrested Bellamy and Evans as they exited the car at 10th Street and Tamarind Avenue in West Palm Beach. The man known as Deandre has not yet been arrested. Bellamy and Evans refused to speak to police after their arrest, the report said. A phone belonging to the BMW's owner was allegedly found in Bellamy's possession, police say. _________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Maria Re: HTML from MS WORD Dear Webby, I write my web pages by saving MS WORD docs as HTML. Usually that works OK. When it didn't, I asked my ISP to look at it and fix it. He got quite rude about it and was of no help. Can you fix it for me? Maria Dear Maria No, I won't, but I'll try not to get rude about it. The HTML produced by WORD does sorta work, but it is definitely not suitable for quick fixes or updating. The code looks awful and any fixes are very time consuming, especially when compared to clean HTML. Your best bet is to just write a new doc and convert that, or use a proper HTML editor to write your pages. I doubt that you will find any volunteer to fix that page. Have FUN! DearWebby Automatically move ALL your settings and programs. No need to re-install them. The only mover recommended by Intel and Microsoft. The following conversation took place one morning between a wife and her now ex-husband. They were discussing government cost cuts that they recently heard about on TV. "Honey," his wife said, while reading the newspaper, "it looks like our government is going to cut overhead and trim down the military forces. They are going to retire six overaged destroyers." To which the husband replied, "Oh...I'm sorry to hear your mother will be out of work." | If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! | |
Thanks to the Folks from Erie for this story: Got my new truck ! I just got my new Chevy pickup, but had to take it back to the dealer because I couldn't figure out how the radio worked. The salesman explained that the radio was voice activated. "Watch this." He said "NELSON." The radio replied "Ricky or Willie?" He said "WILLIE" - - and "On The Road Again" came from the speakers. I drove away happy, and for the next few days, every time I'd say "BEETHOVEN" I'd get beautiful classical music, and if I said "BEATLES" I'd get one of their awesome songs. One day, a couple ran a red light and nearly creamed my new truck but I swerved in time to avoid them. I yelled "AS******S!" The French National Anthem began to play, sung by Jane Fonda and Michael Moore, backed up by John Kerry on guitar, Al Gore on drums, Bill Clinton on sax and Ted Kennedy on booze. Darn, I LOVE my truck! ____________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Sock Puppet Craft Turn a lonely sock into a sock puppet. You can use buttons for the eyes and nose or buy googly eyes at a craft store. Make a head of hair for you puppet out of yarn. Craft felt can be used for further embellishments. Tip provided by Thriftyfun.com font> ____________________________________________________ At an international conference, an American, a British and a Russian were discussing the shortcomings of their diagnoses. "I can't stand it some time. We treat people for cancer, and then they die of AIDS." "I know what you mean." said the British. "We treat them for yellow fever, and it turns out they had malaria. Then, of course, they die." "That is not a problem in our country" said the Russian doctor. "When we treat people for a disease, they die of *that* disease." | | MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL! My all time favorite....Holdman Christmas Lights 2010 - Complete Show |
Thanks to Phil for this: "A government that robs Peter to pay Paul can always count on the support of Paul." Of course, Paul's support is obvious, but it is equally obvious that to rob from Peter to pay Paul will make Peter very, very angry. My question is this: "How can you run a good government with a sore Peter?" ___________________________________________________ | Ophelia Dingbatter's NewsNo sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request. |
____________________________________________________ | Today, December 25, in 0800 Charlemagne was crowned first Holy Roman Emperor in Rome by Pope Leo III. 1066 William the Conqueror was crowned king of England. 1223 St. Francis of Assisi assembled one of the first Nativity scenes, in Greccio, Italy. 1776 Gen. George Washington and his troops crossed the Delaware River for a surprise attack against Hessian forces at Trenton, NJ. 1818 "Silent Night" was performed for the first time, at the Church of St. Nikolaus in Oberndorff, Austria. That church is now a chapel honoring that event. 1868 U.S. President Andrew Johnson granted an unconditional pardon to all persons involved in the Southern rebellion that resulted in the Civil War. 1914 During World War I, British and German troops observed an unofficial truce and even playing football together on the Western Front. 1917 The play "Why Marry?" opened at the Astor Theatre in New York City. "Why Marry?" was the first dramatic play to win a Pulitzer Prize. 1926 Hirohito became the emperor of Japan after the death of his father Emperor Taisho. 1930 The Mt. Van Hoevenberg bobsled run at Lake Placid, New York opened to the public. It was the first bobsled track of international specifications to open in the U.S. 1937 Arturo Toscanini conducted the first broadcast of "Symphony of the Air" over NBC radio. 1939 "A Christmas Carol," by Charles Dickens, was read on CBS radio for the first time. 1941 Hong Kong surrendered to the Japanese. 1962 The Department of Commerce Census Clock in Washington, DC, recorded the U.S. population on this day as 188,000,000. 1972 The Nicaraguan capital Managua was hit by an earthquake. Over 10,000 people were killed. 1979 The USSR invaded Afghanistan in a bid to halt civil war and protect USSR interests. 1989 Ousted Romanian President Nicolae Ceausescu and his wife, Elena, were executed following a popular uprising. 1989 Dissident playwright Vaclav Havel was elected president of Czechoslovakia. 1991 Soviet President Mikhail S. Gorbachev went on television to announce his resignation as leader of a Communist superpower that had already gone out of existence. 1998 Seven days into their journey, Richard Branson, Steve Fossett and Per Lindstrand of Sweden gave up their attempt to make the first nonstop round-the-world balloon flight. They ditched near Hawaii. 2000 Over 300 people were killed and dozens were injured by fire at a Christmas party in the Chinese city of Luoyang. The incident occurred at the Dongdu Disco. 2017 Do smiled. |
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