Good Morning, Do! Today is Tuesday, January 4 ___________________________________________________ If you can spare a coin, PLEASE hit PayPal with it! ___________________________________________________ Bonehead Award Cochise County parents arrested for leaving young son at home alone since Thanksgiving ____________________________________________________ Today, January 4, in 1958 The Soviet satellite Sputknik I fell to the earth from its orbit. The craft had been launched on October 4, 1957. ____________________________________________________ There is something that is much more scarce, something rarer than ability. It is the ability to recognize ability. --- Robert Half ____________________________________________________ Four old timers were playing their weekly game of golf, and one remarked how for Christmas this year he'd love to wake up on Christmas morning, roll out of bed and without an argument go directly to the golf course, meet his buddies and play a round. His buddies all chimed in and said, "Let's do it! We'll make it a priority, figure out a way and meet here early on Christmas morning." Months later, that special morning arrives, and there they are on the links. The first guy says, "Boy, this game cost me a fortune! I bought my wife such a diamond ring that she can't take her eyes off it." Number 2 guy says, "I spent a ton too. My wife is at home planning the cruise I gave her. She was up to her eyeballs in brochures." Number 3 guy says " Well, my wife is at home admiring her new car, reading the manual." They all turn to the last guy in the group and he is staring at them like they have lost their minds. "I can't believe you all went to such expense for this golf game. I patted my wife on the butt and said, 'Well babe, is it sex or golf?' and she said, 'Take an extra sweater, it's probably quite chilly out on the golf course'." ____________________________________________________ Michael Squance It is very rare to capture an image of a Porcupine running toward you. This young animal ran past my feet as it headed for its refuge in a steel culvert drain pipe. Near Carseland, AB. 2 Jan 2022. ____________________________________________________ It was the day after Christmas. The pastor of the church was looking over the cradle when he noticed that the baby Jesus was missing from among the figures. Immediately he turned and went outside and saw a little boy with a red wagon, and in the wagon was the figure of the little infant Jesus. So he walked up the boy and said, "Well, where did you get Him, my fine friend?" The little boy replied, "I got him from the church." "And why did you take Him?" The little boy said, "About a week before Christmas I prayed to the little Lord Jesus and I told Him if he would bring me a red wagon for Christmas, I would give Him a ride around the block in it." ____________________________________________________ Reported by Rock An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Melissa Green, 34, Bobby Green, 40, Elfrida, Arizona, USA Cochise County parents arrested for leaving young son at home alone since Thanksgiving Deputies in Cochise County arrested a couple after they discovered their 11-year-old son had been left at home alone for at least two weeks, officials said. Authorities had been called to do a welfare check at a home in the small town of Elfrida on Dec. 12 after the caller said the boy had been there for an "undetermined length of time." An investigation revealed that the mother, 34-year-old Melissa Green, had left the home before Thanksgiving to go out of the state, and the father, 40-year-old Bobby Green, had left shortly after Thanksgiving. "The child was left alone during the entire time until contact with Sheriff Deputies was made," officials said. The boy told authorities that there was frozen food available at home, and he had not gone to school for at least two weeks prior. He was turned over to Child Protective Services, and deputies reportedly were not able to make contact with the parents until they returned to town on Dec. 29. Both Melissa and Bobby Green were arrested and booked into Cochise County Jail on three counts of child neglect. Their bond has been set at $100,000. ____________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ From: Cindy Re: Is Malwarebytes an affiliate program? Dear Webby Is Malwarebytes an affiliate program? Would it be cheaper i I go directly to their site? Cindy Dear Cindy Malwarebytes was initially an affiliate program, when it was new. However, it has never been cheaper by sleazing behind the affilite, who brought you in. That is not how afiliate systems work. They simply pay a "finders reward" to the affiliate. The person, who buys the program pays the normal, regular price. Affiliate deals are usually expired after a year or two, when a program gets known well enough. Have FUN! DearWebby The budding young Yuppette had been dating a successful stockbroker for several months. Just before Christmas she asked her Mother, "Whatever can you give a man who has everything for Christmas?" Her Mother smiled knowingly and replied, "Encouragement dear, encouragement." | If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! | If you like my work,
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_____________________________________________ The four stages of life: 1) You believe in Santa Claus. 2) You don't believe in Santa Claus. 3) You are Santa Claus. 4) You look like Santa Claus. ______________________________________________ There are two theories to arguing with a woman. Neither one works. ______________________________________________ | Ophelia Dingbatter's NewsNo sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request. |
At a clearance sale, the wife of a federal district court judge found a green tie that was a perfect match for one of her husband's sports jackets. Soon after, while the couple was vacationing at a resort complex to get his mind off a rather complicated cocaine conspiracy case, he noticed a small, round disc sewn into the design of the tie. The judge showed it to a local FBI agent, who was equally suspicious that it might be a 'bug' planted by the conspiracy defendants. The agent sent the device to FBI headquarters In Washington, DC for analysis. Two weeks later, the judge phoned the Washington office to learn the results of their tests. "We're not sure where the disc came from," the FBI told him, "but we discovered that when you press it, it plays 'Jingle Bells.'" ___________________________________________________ | Today, January 4, in 1884 The socialist Fabian Society was founded in London. 1928 NBC Radio debuted "The Dodge Victory Hour" which starred Will Rogers, Paul Whiteman and his Orchestra and singer Al Jolson. 1944 The attack on Monte Cassino was launched by the British Fifth Army in Italy. 1948 Britain granted independence to Burma. 1951 During the Korean conflict, North Korean and Communist Chinese forces captured the city of Seoul. 1953 Tufted plastic carpeting was introduced by Barwick Mills. 1958 The Soviet satellite Sputknik I fell to the earth from its orbit. The craft had been launched on October 4, 1957. 1962 New York City introduced a train that operated without conductors and motormen. 1965 The Fender Guitar Company was sold to CBS for $13 million. 1974 U.S. President Nixon refused to hand over tape recordings and documents subpoenaed by the Senate Watergate Committee. 1984 Wayne "The Great One" Gretzky scored eight points (four goals and four assists) for the second time in his National Hockey League (NHL) career. Edmonton�s Oilers defeated the Minnesota North Stars, 12-8. The game was the highest- scoring NHL game to date. 1991 The U.N. Security Council voted unanimously to condemn Israel's treatment of the Palestinians in the occupied territories. 1997 The Greek Cypriot government signed an agreement to buy S-300 surface-to-air missiles from Russia. 1999 A drifting Nicaraguan fishing boat was found by the Norwegian oil tanker Joelm. The fishermen had been lost at sea for 35 days after the engine of their vessel quit working. 1999 Former professional wrestler Jesse Ventura was sworn in as Minnesota's 37th governor. 2007 Nancy Pelosi became Speaker of the U.S. House of Representatives. She was the first woman to hold the position. 2010 In Dubai, United Arab Emirates, the Burj Dubai (Dubai Tower) opened as the world's tallest tower at 2,625 feet. 2021 Do smiled. |
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