Good Morning, Do! Today is Monday, August 5 _____________________________________________________ Today, August 5 in 1914 The first electric traffic signal lights were installed in Cleveland, Ohio. More of today in history at History ______________________________________________________ | If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! | |
Today's Bonehead Award: St. Louis mother charged with beating her three young children with a hammer _______________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! _______________________________________________ Only sick music makes money today. --- Friedrich Nietzsche (1844 - 1900) It took me fifteen years to discover that I had no talent for writing, but I couldn't give it up because by that time I was too famous. --- Robert Benchley _____________________________________________________ The minister gave his Sunday morning service, as usual, but this particular Sunday, it was considerably longer than normal. Later, at the door, shaking hands with parishioners as they moved out, one man said, "Your sermon, Pastor, was simply wonderful........ so invigorating and inspiring and refreshing." The minister of course, broke out in a big smile, only to hear the man say, "I felt like a new man when I woke up!" ______________________________________________________` _____________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! Thanks for your votes! ___________________________________________________ Reported by the Bausell Sailor: An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Jazmin Curry, 28, Saint Louis, Missouri St. Louis mother charged with beating her three young children with a hammer A mother is charged with beating her three young children with a hammer. Authorities have identified the suspect as 28-year-old Jazmin Curry. She is facing three felony counts of abuse or neglect of a child. Court documents say that Curry hit her three kids ages five, six, and eight with a hammer on June 1, 2019 inside her downtown apartment on North Seventh Street near The America's Center. The documents reveal that the case came to light a month later when St. Louis City Police and the Children's Division responded to calls for concern that Curry was physically abusing her three children. The court documents say that all three children were interviewed and made statements that Curry struck them with a hammer and demonstrated how she did it. The documents reveal that the children had visible injuries including bruises, scratches, redness and bruising to the 8-year- old's eye. The 8-year-old also had a fractured arm. The child told authorities Curry grabbed her arm and struck it. A spokesperson from the Circuit Attorney's office tells us Curry was arrested on Wednesday and charged today. Court documents also indicate that Curry has a criminal record in Texas. She was convicted of felony robbery in 2016 and pled guilty to theft of property less than $500 in 2012. She was jailed in this case on a $50,000 bond. DearWebby's Tech Support Pits From: Jan Re: Printng Envelopes Dear Webby, My address book is on Outlook (I know, but I started the book in the early 1990's and have a lot of data input time invested) and I have moved it to my new computer running W10 (I know bad twice) and now MS Word freezes up when I try to address an envelope using the address book. It was problematic on my old XP machine and crashed word regularly if I updated or added to the address book, but it's useless now. I publish the monthly newsletter for our Non-Profit organization and address about 170 envelopes a month for the mailing. I just finished addressing them, so I have a 30-day break before the next mailing. It's cheaper for the organization if I address the envelopes rather than use labels since my time is donated. Can you recommend software that will run on W10 and can just pull an address from its data base and print a freaking address on an envelope? 'Cause my $300 operating system and $300 MS Office "Professional" can't seem to get the job done. It would be good if the software can import the Outlook .wab file, but I also have the mailing list in a MS Word document, and at this point would even be willing to type each address by hand into the database if I only had to do it once. Thank you Webby, Paul Dear Paul Industry and commerce nowadays use Open Office. You can get it free from my toolbox at http://webby.com/tools Open Office is platform independent, and doesn't care whether you handicap yourself with W10 or not. To see your contacts, at the bottom of Outlook, choose the People icon. At the top of your Outlook ribbon, choose the File tab. ... Choose Open > EXPORT Then you can produce a CSV text file, that other programs can import. To print an envelope, follow these steps: Open OOo Writer. Insert > Envelope. On the Envelope tab, enter your address info. On the Format tab, set Size > Format to DL. ... On the Printer tab, select the layout that reflects how to feed. On the same tab, click on Setup. Have FUN! DearWebby Automatically move ALL your settings and programs. No need to re-install them. The only mover recommended by Intel and Microsoft. As infantrymen stationed in the Panama Canal Zone, we'd often complain that the enlisted men's barracks didn't have refrigerators. After one particularly hot day of maneuvers in the tropical sun, I returned to find out that I'd received orders for transfer to Fort Wainwright in Alaska. My buddies teased me, saying that when I got to Alaska I would find out what the Army did with all their refrigerators. I arrived at Fort Wainwright at the end of December. Sure enough, each enlisted man's room had an Army-issued refrigerator. | If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! | |
A woman went to the Post Office to buy stamps for her cards. "What denomination?" Asked the clerk. "Oh, good heavens! Have we come to this?" said the woman. "Well, give me 50 Baptist and 50 Catholic. ___________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Thriftyfun.com Save Money With LED Christmas Lights They aren't quite as bright as other lights, but LED Christmas lights will save you a bundle on your energy bill. They cost as much as 90% less to operate. LED lights also produce almost no heat, which reduces the risk of fire. thriftyfun.Com ____________________________________________________ | | 25-popular-science-myths-debunked |
___________________________________________________ "Daddy, where did I come from?" the seven-year-old asked. It was a moment for which her parents had carefully prepared. They took her into the living room, got out the encyclopedia and several other books, and explained all they thought she should know about sexual attraction, affection, love, and reproduction. Then they both sat back and smiled contentedly. "Does that answer your question?' her father asked. "Not really," the little girl said. "Judy said she came from Detroit. I want to know where I came from." ___________________________________________________ A missionary visited a small village in a remote jungle and began preaching the gospel. "Jesus saves!" exclaimed the missionalry. "Bawana!" shouted the natives. "Ye must be baptized!" exclaimed the missionary. "Bawana!" shouted the natives "Donate tithes and offerings!" exclaimed the missionary. "Bawana!" shouted the natives. Having had such a successful time, the missionary inquired of the chief as to how he could go to the next village, to share the gospel with them too. The chief replied, "You go down road one thousand paces, you turn right, climb over wall made of rocks, run across field. Many bulls in field, you run fast, but be careful not step in bawana." ___________________________________________________ The impish girl turned on the tractor and pushed the outhouse into the creek. Later, her father told her the story of George Washington chopping down his father's cherry tree but wasn't spanked because he had told the truth. The girl proudly announced, "I cannot tell a lie. I pushed the outhouse into the creek." He told her to bend over and the shocked child protested that George Washington had not been punished. The father replied, "Well, George's father wasn't IN the cherry tree when it got chopped down!" __________________________________________________ | Ophelia Dingbatter's NewsNo sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request. |
___________________________________________________ | Today, August 5 in 1833 The village of Chicago was incorporated. The population was approximately 250. 1861 The U.S. federal government levied its first income tax. The tax was 3% of all incomes over $800. The wartime measure was rescinded in 1872. 1864 During the U.S. Civil War, Union forces led by Adm. David G. Farragut were led into Mobile Bay, Alabama. 1884 On Bedloe's Island in New York Harbor, the cornerstone for the Statue of Liberty was laid. 1914 The first electric traffic signal lights were installed in Cleveland, Ohio. 1921 The first play-by-play broadcast of a baseball game was done by Harold Arlin. KDKA Radio in Pittsburgh, PA described the action between the Pirates and Philadelphia. 1921 The cartoon "On the Road to Moscow", by Rollin Kirby, was published in the "New York World". It was the first cartoon to win a Pulitzer Prize. 1923 Henry Sullivan became the first American to swim across the English Channel. 1924 In the New York "Daily News" debuted the comic strip "Little Orphan Annie," by Harold Gray. 1944 Polish insurgents liberated a German labor camp in Warsaw. 348 Jewish prisoners were freed. 1953 During the Korean conflict prisoners were exchanged at Panmunjom. The exchange was labeled Operation Big Switch. 1960 For the first time two major league baseball clubs traded managers. Detroit traded Jimmy Dykes for Cleveland's Joe Gordon. 1963 The Limited Test Ban Treaty was signed by the United States, Britain, and the Soviet Union. The treaty banned nuclear tests in space, underwater, and in the atmosphere. 1964 U.S. aircraft bombed North Vietnam after North Vietnamese boats attacked U.S. destroyers in the Gulf of Tonkin. 1966 In New York, groundbreaking for the construction of the original World Trade Center began. 1969 The Mariner 7, a U.S. space probe, passed by Mars. Photographs and scientific data were sent back to Earth. 1974 U.S. President Nixon said that he expected to be impeached. Nixon had ordered the investigation into the Watergate break-in to halt. 1974 "Tank McNamara", the comic strip, premiered in 75 newspapers. 1981 The U.S. federal government started firing striking air traffic controllers. 1984 Toronto's Cliff Johnson set a major league baseball record by hitting the 19th pinch-hit home run in his career. 1986 It was revealed that artist Andrew Wyeth had secretly created 240 drawings and paintings of his neighbor. The works of Helga Testorf had been created over a 15-year period. 1989 In Honduras, five Central American presidents began meeting to discuss the timetable for the dismantling of the Nicaraguan Contra bases. 1990 U.S. President George H.W. Bush angrily denounced the Iraqi invasion of Kuwait. 1991 An investigation was formally launched by Democratic congressional leaders to find out if the release of American hostages was delayed until after the Reagan-Bush presidential election. 1991 Iraq admitted to misleading U.N. inspectors about secret biological weapons. 1992 Federal civil rights charges were filed against four Los Angeles police officers. The officers had been acquitted on California State charges. Two of the officers were convicted and jailed on violation of civil rights charges. 1998 Iraqi President Saddam Hussein began not cooperating with U.N. weapons inspectors. 2002 The U.S. closed its consulate in Karachi, Pakistan. The consulate was closed after local authorities removed large concrete blocks and reopened the road in front of the building to normal traffic. 2009 Google purchased its first public company. The company was the video software maker On2 Technologies. 2011 NASA announced that its Mars Reconnaissance Orbiter had captured photographic evidence of possible liquid water on Mars during warm seasons. 2011 Juno was launched from Cape Canaveral Air Force Station on a mission to Jupiter. It was the first solar-powered spacecraft to go to Jupiter. 2011 Standard & Poor's Financial Services lowered the United States' AAA credit rating by one notch to AA-plus. 2019 Do smiled. |
|
If you can help with the cost of the
Humor Letter, please donate what you can! | |
Go to TOP
Well, Do , that's all for today.
Have FUN !
Dear Webby from Webby.com
Please give a friend a subscription to the Humor Letter
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter,
please vote for it at the Ezine Finder:
Thanks for your votes!
ARCHIVE: If you missed previous issues, you can see them
in the Humor Letter Blog at http://webby.com/humor/blog
If the greeting on top does NOT have your first name,
or at least your favorite nickname, please tell me.
I can correct that in two seconds and greet you properly
from then on.
If you want to give a gift subscription to a friend, but don't
have time to subscribe her or him, just hit REPLY and tell me.
I will gladly enter them for you and send them a confirmation request.
To reply to me personally, just hit REPLY or write to humor@webby.com
If you do not normally get the Humor Letter every day, and this was the first time,
then a friend sent you a one time sample or maybe even gave you a gift subscription.
If you like the Humor Letter, then you can subscribe at http://webby.com/sub.html
You can also UNsubscribe there.
If you don't want to receive the Webby Humor Letter,
please unsubscribe by clicking the link below:
You are currently subscribed to the Regular HTML version with this address:
newsletter@newslettercollector.com
UNSUBSCRIBE from the regular HTMLversion Give a friend a free gift subscription to the Humor Letter . | Search the web for:
Recommended Resources Find a human
Bypass voice menus
Web Tools
handy program downloads
SPAM CONTROL made Easy!
Click here for a FREE
30 day trial
This is the Mail Washer that I use and have
used for over 10 years. I have tested many
others, but Mail Washer is still The Best
spam control Crap Cleaner Safely get rid of
tons of useless crap left over from
old, obsolete updates, temp files, lost
file fragments, etc.
STILL FREE
Babelfish Translator Converter Urban Legends
Truth or Hoax?
Check before believing chain letters
Great tool for getting rid of
spy-ware and mal-ware. Still FREE
This Undeleter will easily and securely recover deleted files from hard drives, flash drives, USB external drives, Zip drives, Firewire drives, digital camera cards, and more. This powerful recovery software can recover deleted files from most data loss scenarios.
Is your data worth recovery? SmartFix The ONLY Registry Fixer, that I recommend!
All In One PX Fixer has all the necessary tools included: Fix System Errors, Improve Startup, Clean Registry, Defrag Disk, Optimize System Settings, Back-Up, etc. Currently Smart OC Fixer is 50% off regular price! Roboform, still the best password manager.
Still FREE
Highly recommended by DearWebby
FREE, no fuss download!
Domain Name registration:
Discuss your needs first, don't just register a name, that might not be good for you! Ask DearWebby first. That will save you a lot of money!
YOUR OWN
Postcard Site ! You too can easily have a postcard site for business or fun.
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Cumuli Ezine Finder: Etiquette To Get Read
Ebook with power tips
for effective writing,
by DearWebby
Ads are $50 per month for subscribers only.
$60 per month for anybody else.
Dear Bubba
All is forgiven. I still love you. Please come back!
Ps. Congratulations on your lottery win!
Your Betty-Sue
That could be YOUR ad for $50 per week.
Subscribers only!
Nudist Colony of Alberta
Closed for the season
Space Weather
Solar storms, Auroras
Thesaurus
NASA Multimedia Gallery Sky Map: the interactive planetarium of the Web
Sky Watch: Calendar of celestial events
Weather Underground
Maps and Satellite
Do, Please Feed
Dear Webby!
Privacy Policy
Unique visitors since 1/1/11
Have FUN
Dear Webby
CEO of Webby, Inc
DearWebby @ webby.com
Box 646
Black Diamond, AB T0L 0H0
Canada |
| Subscribe | Give a Gift Subscription | Unsubscribe
Click here for Large Print
|
|
