Good Morning, Do! Today is Saturday, October 30 ___________________________________________________ If you can spare a coin, PLEASE hit PayPal with it! ___________________________________________________ Today's Bonehead Award: Rehab Clinic Owner Sold Fentanyl ___________________________________________________ Today, October 30 in 1961 The Soviet Union tested a hydrogen bomb with a force of approximately 58 megatons. ____________________________________________________ There was a time when we expected nothing of our children but obedience, as opposed to the present, when we expect everything of them but obedience. --- Anatole Broyard Sometimes I think the surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that none of it has tried to contact us. --- Bill Watterson, cartoonist If I only had a little humility, I'd be perfect. --- Ted Turner ____________________________________________________ A merchant who is known to be remiss in paying his bills is haggling with a wholesaler. "Why bother bargaining," his junior partner asks, "when you're not gonna pay him, anyway?" "I like him," says the merchant. "I want to help keep down his losses." ____________________________________________________ I eat half a loaf of bread per week. The deer get the other half. ____________________________________________________ A lady came to the hospital to visit a friend. She had not been in a hospital for several years and felt very ignorant about all the new technology. A technician followed her onto the elevator, wheeling a large, intimidating looking machine with tubes and wires and dials. "Boy, would I hate to be hooked up to that thing," she said. "So would I," replied the technician. "It's a floor-cleaning machine." ____________________________________________________ Reported by Rock An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Misty Gilley, 50, Altamonte Springs, Florida, USA Rehab Clinic Owner Sold Fentanyl The owner of a drug rehab clinic sold fentanyl to a police informant inside the facility, according to Florida investigators who say that the accused woman was targeting a vulnerable population and preying on those looking for hope while battling a vicious disease. Police yesterday arrested Misty Gilley, 50, on felony narcotics charges for allegedly selling fentanyl, a powerful opioid, out of Simply Recovery, the substance abuse treatment facility she operates in Altamonte Springs, a city outside Orlando. Gilley, seen at right, was freed from custody today after posting $49,500 bond and is scheduled to be arraigned on December 7. State incorporation records list Gilley as the manager and registered agent of Simply Recovery LLC. According to a Seminole County Sheriffs Office arrest report, the probe of Gilley began earlier this month when an investigator received information that she was selling fentanyl and cocaine out of her place of business and her home. At the direction of police, a confidential informant from Gilleys place of business purchased $40 of fentanyl from her inside Simply Recovery. A subsequent $160 fentanyl sale by Gilley to a police informant took place inside her Altamonte Springs residence. During a raid Monday at the clinic, police found a backpack containing multiple used needles, a gram of cocaine, and 18 small baggies containing fentanyl. The backpack also contained two prescription bottles with the name Misty Gilley. In the clinics group therapy room, investigators found multiple baggies with suspected fentanyl residue in a garbage can (which also contained multiple bloody tissues, bloody filters, and used needles). The room, according to the arrest report, was apparently being used for drug use activities. A search of Gilleys home turned up 11 baggies with suspected fentanyl residue," police noted. An undercover cop who interacted with Gilley while the investigation was ongoing alleged that while operating a rehab clinic, she was also preying on those looking for hope while battling a vicious disease. ____________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ From: Elaine Re: Thesaurus Dear Webby, I desperately need a decent Thesaurus. The one I had been using is not working anymore. Elaine Dear Elaine That one is easy: Thesaurus Have FUN! DearWebby | If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! | If you like my work,
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_____________________________________________ A radical feminist is getting on a bus when, just in front of her, a man gets up from his seat. She thinks to herself, "Here's another male chauvinist pig trying to keep suppressing the independence of a woman by implying she is obligated to be grateful for a lousy seat", and she pushes him back onto the seat. A few minutes later, the man tries to get up again. She is insulted again and refuses to let him up.Finally, the man says, "Lady, you'll have to go molest somebody else now. I'm two miles past my stop already and got to get off the bus." ______________________________________________ A man and woman are having marriage problems, and decide to end their union after a very short time together. After a most brief attempt to reconcile, the couple goes to court to finalize their break-up. The judge asks the husband, "What has brought you to the point that you are now at, where you are not able to keep this marriage together?" The husband says, "In the six weeks we've been together, we haven't been able to agree on one thing." The wife says, "Six and a half weeks." "Granted!", the judge said. "Get outa here!" ______________________________________________ | Ophelia Dingbatter's NewsNo sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request. |
The newly wed wife said to her husband when he returned from work: "I have great news for you. Pretty soon we're going to be three in this house instead of two." The husband started glowing with happiness and kissing his wife said: "Oh darling, I'm the happiest man in the world." But then she said: "I'm glad that you feel this way about my mother moving in with us." ___________________________________________________ | Today, October 30, in 1817 The independent government of Venezuela was established by Simon Bolivar. 1831 Escaped slave Nat Turner was apprehended in Southampton County, VA, several weeks after leading the bloodiest slave uprising in American history. 1875 The constitution of Missouri was ratified by popular vote. 1894 The time clock was patented by Daniel M. Cooper of Rochester, NY. 1938 Orson Welles' "The War of the Worlds" aired on CBS radio. The belief that the realistic radio dramatization was a live news event about a Martian invasion caused panic among listeners. 1943 In Moscow, a declaration was signed by the Governments of the Soviet Union, the United Kingdom, the United States and China called for an early establishment of an international organization to maintain peace and security. The goal was supported on December 1, 1943, at a meeting in Teheran. 1945 The U.S. government announced the end of shoe rationing. 1953 General George C. Marshall was awarded the Nobel Peace Prize. 1961 The Soviet Union tested a hydrogen bomb with a force of approximately 58 megatons. 1961 The Soviet Party Congress unanimously approved an order to remove Joseph Stalin's body from Lenin's tomb. 1972 U.S. President Richard Nixon approved legislation to increase Social Security spending by $5.3 billion. 1972 In Illinois, 45 people were killed when two trains collided on Chicago's south side. 1975 Prince Juan Carlos assumed power in Spain as dictator Francisco Franco was near death. 1975 The New York Daily News ran the headline "Ford to City: Drop Dead." The headline came a day after U.S. President Gerald R. Ford said he would veto any proposed federal bailout of New York City. 1982 Portugal's constitution was revised for the first time since it was ratified on April 25, 1976. 1984 In Poland, police found the body of kidnapped pro- Solidarity priest Father Jerry Popieluszko. His death was blamed on four security officers. 1989 Mitsubishi Estate Company announced it would buy 51 percent of Rockefeller Group Inc. of New York. 1993 Martin Fettman, America's first veterinarian in space, performed the world's first animal dissections in space, while aboard the space shuttle Columbia. 1993 The United Nations deadline concerning ousted Haitian President Jean-Bertrand Aristide passed with country's military still in control. 1995 Federalists prevailed over separatists in Quebec in a referendum concerning secession from the federation of Canada. 1998 The terrorist who hijacked a Turkish Airlines plane and the 39 people on board was killed when anti-terrorist squads raided the plane. 2001 In New York City, U.S. President George W. Bush threw out the first pitch at Game 3 of the World Series between the New York Yankees and the Arizona Diamondbacks. 2021 Do smiled. |
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