Good Morning, Do! Today is Friday, October 25 Time to wear a bit of red to show your support for the troops! ____________________________________________________ Today, October 25 in 1917 The Bolsheviks (Communists) under Vladimir Ilyich Lenin seized power in Russia. More of today in history at History ______________________________________________________ | If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! | |
Today's Bonehead Award: Floriduh man had sex with stuffed animals at Target _______________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! _______________________________________________ Failure is not the only punishment for laziness; there is also the success of others. --- Jules Renard (1864 - 1910) An ostentatious man will rather relate a blunder or an absurdity he has committed, than be debarred from talking of his own dear person. --- Joseph Addison (1672 - 1719) _______________________________________________ A nervous taxpayer was unhappily conversing with the IRS Tax auditor, who had come to review his records. At one point the auditor exclaimed, "Mr. Carr, we feel it is a great privilege to be allowed to live and work in the USA. As a citizen you have an obligation to pay taxes, and we expect you to eagerly pay them with a smile." "Thank goodness," returned Mr. Carr, with a giant grin on his face from ear to ear, "I thought you were going to want me to pay with money." ________________________________________________` Chestnut headed Bee eater ____________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! Thanks for your votes! ___________________________________________________ An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Cody Meader, 20, St. Petersburg, Floriduh Man Had Sex With Stuffed Animals At Target A Florida Man yesterday sexually assaulted a pair of large stuffed animal toys inside a Target store, according to police who arrested the fiend on a criminal mischief charge. As detailed in a criminal complaint, Cody Christopher Meader, 20, entered the retailer around 2 PM Tuesday and approached a display of merchandise featuring characters from the Disney film Frozen. Meader, seen above, selected a large Olaf stuffed animal and proceeded to place it on the floor of the Target in Pinellas Park. He then began to dry hump the cinematic snowman until he ejaculated on the merchandise, a cop reported. Meader returned the soiled Olaf back to the display before entering the toy department, where he selected a large unicorn stuffed animal and began to 'dry hump' this item. After consorting with the stuffed animals, Meader, who lives in St. Petersburg, was detained while still inside the store. After being read his rights, Meader reportedly admitted to doing 'stupid stuff' and admitted that he had 'nutted' on the Olaf stuffed animal. The stuffed items, cops say, were removed from the store floor and destroyed. According to the complaint, Meader's father told police that def has a history of this type of behavior. Court records, however, list no prior criminal cases against Meader. Charged with criminal mischief, Meader was booked into the county jail on the misdemeanor count. He was released from custody last night after posting $150 bond. DearWebby's Tech Support Pits From: Moe Re: Monitor can not be set to 72 Hz Dear Webby, My Monitor can not be set to 72 Hz refesh. However, your sugestion to tilt it down a bit helped tremendously! Moe Dear Moe Glad it helped! Have FUN! DearWebby Automatically move ALL your settings and programs. "Iran is going to build an island just for women who want to go on vacation. No men will be allowed on the island. Which leads to the question, 'If something goes wrong, whose fault will it be?'" --- Jay Leno | If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! | |
>From Rick Dinosaurs are fascinating. My four-year-old is obsessed with them. Recently we were riding on a bus, and he asked another passenger for her name. "My name is Deena," she said. "Can you say Deena?" "Deena," said my son. "Can you say triptopachycephalosaurus?" ___________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Thriftyfun.com font color="#009990"> Zoo Memberships If you have a zoo near buy, consider buying a zoo membership to save money and have fun. While admission tickets seem quite expensive if you are going for the day, family memberships are usually very reasonable. If you go just once a month, the membership price is well worth while. ____________________________________________________ | | Ghost Busters Halloween Light Show |
___________________________________________________ Do was at a yard sale one day and saw a box marked "Electronic cat and dog caller -- guaranteed to work." Do looked inside and was amused to see an electric can opener. ___________________________________________________ A mother looked out a window and saw Johnny playing church with their three kittens. He had them lined up and was preaching to them. The mother turned around to do some work. A while later she heard meowing and scratching on the door. She went to the window and saw Johnny baptizing the kittens. She opened the window and said, "Johnny, stop that! You'll drown those kittens." Johnny looked at her and said with much conviction in his voice: "They should had thought of that before they joined my church." ___________________________________________________ "I'm ashamed of you," the mother said. "Fighting with your best friend is a terrible thing to do!" "He threw a rock at me!" the boy said. "So I threw one at him." The mother stated emphatically, "When he threw a rock at you, you should have come to me." The boy quickly replied, "What good would that have done? My aim is much better than yours!" __________________________________________________ | Ophelia Dingbatter's NewsNo sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request. |
___________________________________________________ | Today, October 25 in 1415 In Northern France, England won the Battle of Agincourt over France during the Hundred Years' War. Almost 6000 Frenchmen were killed while fewer than 400 were lost by the English. 1812 During the War of 1812, the U.S. frigate United States captured the British vessel Macedonian. 1854 The Charge of the Light Brigade took place during the Crimean War. The British were winning the Battle of Balaclava when Lord James Cardigan received an order to attack the Russians. He took his troops into a valley and suffered 40 percent caualties. Later it was revealed that the order was the result of confusion and was not given intentionally. 1870 The first U.S. trademark was given. The recipient was the Averill Chemical Paint Company of New York City. 1917 The Bolsheviks (Communists) under Vladimir Ilyich Lenin seized power in Russia. 1929 Alber B. Fall, of U.S. President Harding's cabinet, was found guilty of taking a bribe. He was sentenced to a year in prison and fined $100,000. 1951 In Panmunjom, peace talks concerning the Korean War resumed after 63 days. 1954 A U.S. cabinet meeting was televised for the first time. 1955 The microwave oven, for home use, was introduced by The Tappan Company. 1958 U.S. Marines withdrew from Beirut, Lebanon. They had been sent in on July 25, 1958, to protect the nation's pro-Western government. 1960 The Accutron watch by the Bulova Watch Company was introduced. 1962 U.S. Ambassador Adlai Stevenson presented photographic evidence to the United Nations Security Council. The photos were of Soviet missile bases in Cuba. 1962 American author John Steinbeck was awarded the Nobel Prize in literature. 1971 The U.N. General Assembly voted to expel Taiwan and admit mainland China. 1983 U.S. troops and soldiers from six Caribbean nations invaded Grenada to restore order and provide protection to U.S. citizens after a recent coup within Grenada's Communist (pro- Cuban) government. 1990 It was announced by U.S. Defense Secretary Dick Cheney that the Pentagon was planning to send 100,000 more troops to Saudi Arabia. 2000 AT&T Corp. announced that it would restructure into a family of four separately traded companies (consumer, business, broadband and wireless). 2001 It was announced that scientists had unearthed the remains of an ancient crocodile which lived 110 million years ago. The animal, found in Gadoufaoua, Niger, grew as long as 40 feet and weighed as much as eight metric tons. 2019 Do smiled. |
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