Good Morning, Do! Today is Wednesday, November 24 ___________________________________________________ If you can spare a coin, PLEASE hit PayPal with it! ___________________________________________________ Today's Bonehead Award: Sierra Vista man accused of domestic violence arrested after escaping custody ___________________________________________________ Today, November 24 in 1983 The Palestine Liberation Organization released six Israeli prisoners in exchange for the release of 4,500 Palestinians and Lebanese held by the Israelis. ____________________________________________________ One thing you will probably remember well is any time you forgive and forget. --- Franklin P. Jones A paranoid is someone who knows a little of what's going on. --- William S. Burroughs (1914 - 1997) ____________________________________________________ There was this preacher who was an avid golfer. Every chance he could get, he could be found on the golf course swinging away. It was an obsession. One Sunday was a picture perfect day for golfing. The sun was out, no clouds in the sky, and the temperature was just right. The preacher was in a quandary as to what to do, and shortly, the urge to play golf overcame him. He called an assistant to tell him that he was sick and could not do church, packed the car up, and drove three hours to a golf course where no one would recognize him. Happily, he began to play the course. As this was going on, an angel up above was watching the preacher and was quite perturbed. He went to God and said, "Look at the preacher. He should be punished for what he is doing." God nodded in agreement. The preacher teed up on the first hole. He swung at the ball, and it sailed effortlessly through the air and landed right in the cup three hundred and fifty yards away! A picture perfect hole-in-one. He was amazed and excited, his mouth open in shock. The angel was a little shocked as well. He turned to God and said, "Begging Your pardon, but I thought you were going to punish him." God smiled. "Think about it... who is he going to brag to ?!?" ____________________________________________________ Red Wolf There are only 8 (EIGHT) red wolves left! ____________________________________________________ A man is driving with his wife at his side and his mother-in-law in the back seat. The women just won't leave him alone. His mother-in-law says, "You're driving too fast!" His wife says, "Stay more to the left." And so on. After ten mixed orders, the man turns to his wife and asks, "Who's driving this car anyway? You or your mother?" ____________________________________________________ Reported by Rock An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Tyler Nahoopii, 29, Sierra Vista, Arizona, USA Sierra Vista man accused of domestic violence arrested after escaping custody A suspect wanted in a Sierra Vista domestic violence case who escaped custody has been arrested, according to authorities. Sierra Vista police said 29-year-old Tyler Nahoopii was taken back into custody on Nov. 20. Nahoopii was wanted on suspicion of domestic violence, criminal damage and domestic violence disorderly conduct charges stemming from a Sept. 9 incident. Police tried to arrest Nahoopii on Nov. 12, but he was able to get away and run from the area and couldnt be located after an extensive search. Authorities said Nahoopii now is facing charges of resisting arrest, escape and theft. According to the Arizona Department of Corrections, Nahoopiis criminal history includes convictions for theft and disorderly conduct in 2011, drug possession in 2012, attempted burglary and drug possession in 2014 and robbery in 2017. Tyler Naoopii was taken into custody today with the assistance of CCSO and DPS. ____________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ From: Julia Re: Ver-af-akayschun reckwired Dear Webby Your Mailwasher probably nukes all mails that have that ver af-akayshun required scam in or on it. Are ALL mails with that topic a scam, or could any of them be legit? Julia Dear Julia They are ALL phony. 100% phony. Think about it! If you do receive an email, that claims you have to ver a fie it, then it is already ver a fiedet. DUH! If you ask your ISP about it, they will just laugh and think you are not as smart as you look. And yes, I have indeed set my MailWasher to send anything related to that straight to hell, automatically, without even showing the subject line. Just do the same, and do not worry about it. No legitimate ISP will ever ask you to ver-a-fie the mail they have sent to you. Remember Lil Thomlin, my favorite phone operator? She used to ask: "Awwe wooo the number I jsust called?" Just dump those scams. No point in even replying. That would just verify that your address is live. Have FUN! DearWebby | If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! | If you like my work,
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_____________________________________________ A young man called his mother and announced excitedly that he had just met the woman of his dreams. Now what should he do? His mother had an idea: "Why don't you send her flowers, and on the card invite her to your apartment for a home-cooked meal?" He thought this was a great strategy, and a week later, the woman came to dinner. His mother called the next day to see how things had gone. "I was totally humiliated," he moaned. "She insisted on washing the dishes." "What's wrong with that?" asked his mother. "We hadn't started eating yet." ______________________________________________ A man walks up the counter and says, "I'll have 2 pounds of Tofu." The man at the counter says, "Oh, you must be from California." The man responds, "How stereotypical! If I had ordered Pepperoni would you think I was Italian?" "No." answers the man at the counter. And besides, pepperoni is more Sicilian than Italian. "If I had ordered Wienerschnitzel would you have thought I was German," he asks. "No." says the man behind the counter, "and besides, Wiener Schnitzel are from Wien, the capital of Austria." "Then why," he asks, "would you think I was from California, just because I want 2 pounds of tofu ???" The man looks up from the counter and says, "'Cause you're in a Home Depot hardware store." ______________________________________________ | Ophelia Dingbatter's NewsNo sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request. |
I couldn't help overhearing a man at a nearby phone. "I know it's something you want," he said earnestly, "but I don't think tattoos are a good idea. And the same goes for body piercing. As long as you're living in my house, I think you should respect my wishes." I was secretly cheering him on for his fatherly firmness. Then came the 'coup de grace': "Besides, Mom, you're 75 years old! You don't NEED a tattoo!" ___________________________________________________ | Today, November 24, in 1615 French King Louis XIII married Ann of Austria. They were both 14 years old. 1859 Charles Darwin, a British naturalist, published "On the Origin of Species." It was the paper in which he explained his theory of evolution through the process of natural selection. 1863 During the Civil War, the battle for Lookout Mountain began in Tennessee. 1871 The National Rifle Association was incorporated in the U.S. 1874 Joseph F. Glidden was granted a patent for a barbed fencing material. 1903 Clyde J. Coleman received the patent for an electric self-starter for an automobile. 1940 Nazis closed off the Jewish ghetto in Warsaw, Poland. Over the next three years the population dropped from 350,000 to 70,000 due to starvation, disease and deportations to concentration camps. 1944 During World War II, the first raid against the Japanese capital of Tokyo was made by land-based U.S. bombers. 1947 The "Hollywood 10," were cited for contempt of Congress for refusing to answer questions about alleged Communist influence in their industry. 1963 Dallas nightclub owner Jack Ruby shot and killed Lee Harvey Oswald live on national television. 1969 Apollo 12 landed safely in the Pacific Ocean bringing an end to the second manned mission to the moon. 1971 Hijacker Dan Cooper, known as D.B. Cooper, parachuted from a Northwest Airlines 727 over Washington state with $200,000 in ransom. 1983 The Palestine Liberation Organization released six Israeli prisoners in exchange for the release of 4,500 Palestinians and Lebanese held by the Israelis. 1985 In Malta, Egyptian commandos stormed an Egyptian jetliner. 60 people died in the raid. 1987 The U.S. and the Soviet Union agreed to scrap short- and medium-range missiles. It was the first superpower treaty to eliminate an entire class of nuclear weapons. 1989 Czechoslovakia's hard-line party leadership resigned after more than a week of protests against its policies. 1992 In China, a domestic jetliner crashed, killing 141 people. 1993 The U.S. Congress gave its final approval to the Brady handgun control bill. 1993 Robert Thompson and Jon Venables (both 11 years old) were convicted of murdering 2-year-old James Bulger of Liverpool, England. They were both sentenced to "indefinite detention." 1995 In Ireland, the voters narrowly approved a constitutional amendment legalizing divorce. 1996 Rusty Wallace won the first NASCAR event to be held in Japan. 1998 AOL (America Online) announced a deal for their purchase of Netscape for $4.21 billion. They promptly killed it, making Microsoft Internet Explorer the only browser. A lot of us have never forgiven AOL for that. 2021 Do smiled. |
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