Good Morning, Do! Today is Saturday, December 5 If you can spare a coin, PLEASE hit PayPal with it! Thank you, David !! Thank you, ___________________________________________________ International Bonehead Award Attacker is fatally beaten and stabbed by victims mother and sister ____________________________________ Today, December 5 in 1945 The so-called "Lost Squadron" disappeared. The five U.S. Navy Avenger bombers carrying 14 Navy flyers began a training mission at the Ft. Lauderdale Naval Air Station. They were never heard from again. _____________________________________________________ If you want to know what God thinks of money, just look at the people he gave it to. --- Dorothy Parker (1893 - 1967) _____________________________________________________ Two paramedics were dispatched to check on an elderly man who had become disoriented. They decided to take him to the hospital for evaluation. En route, with siren going, they questioned the man to determine his level of awareness. Leaning close, one asked, "Sir, do you know what we're doing right now?" The old man slowly looked out the ambulance window. "Oh," he replied, "I'd say about 50, maybe 55." _____________________________________________________ ___________________________________________________ > From Judy Had to send you this true story: My niece has 4 kids and was breast feeding the baby when #3 child, Jack wanted to climb up into her lap. During the process he was using his elbows to push his way up and hit her other breast so she said 'watch the elbows Jack'. When Grandmother came over later, Jack climbed up into her lap, patted her rather ample bosom and said 'I like your elbows, Grandma'. Needless to say, they will always be elbows to us from now on! _______________________________________________ Reported by Dr Moe An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Justin Goss, 40, Glendale, California USA Attacker is fatally beaten and stabbed by victims mother and sister A man who broke into a South Pasadena home and attacked his estranged girlfriend died after he was stabbed and beaten by the womans mother and sister Saturday morning, authorities said. The man threw a large concrete paver through the front window of a home in the 500 block of Five Oaks Drive, stepped inside and began choking the woman and punching her in the face, said Los Angeles County Sheriffs Lt. Barry Hall. The womans mother and sister came to her aid, stabbing the man with a kitchen knife and beating him with a golf club, Hall said. They tried to pull him off, and it didnt work; he was too strong, Hall said. So they had to resort to using weapons. South Pasadena police officers responding to a report of domestic violence entered through the shattered window and found the man, who was pronounced dead at the scene by the South Pasadena Fire Department, authorities said. The L.A. County coroners office identified him as Justin Goss, 40, of Glendale. The woman, 37, was taken to a hospital, treated for injuries to her face and released, officials said. Her mother and sister were not facing charges, according to authorities. They were well within their right to act in defense of their sister and daughter, Hall said. DearWebby's Tech Support Pits From: Enna RE: What is better, Open or Libre Dear Webby, Which is better, Open Office or Office Libre? Enna Dear Enna Both office suites offer document templates, but LibreOffice provides more built-in ready-to-use templates than OpenOffice. ... Winner: LibreOffice because features such as templates and Wizards appear to be easier to use and access. Overall, however, both have many of the same features and capabilities. For everyday work, it makes no difference. I doubt you will notice any difference if you use one at work and the other one at home. Have FUN! DearWebby | If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! | If you like my work,
Please donate a dollar,
or two, if you can afford it!
Please, help me stay online!
|
_____________________________________________ The following responses were received during a newspaper contest in which contestants from ages 4 to 15 were asked to provide their own "Deep Thoughts" (like those prepared by Jack Handey). * I believe you should live each day as if it is your last, which is why I don't have any clean laundry because, come on, who wants to wash clothes on the last day of their life? --Age 15 * Give me the strength to change the things I can, the grace to accept the things I cannot, and a great big bag of money. --Age 13 * It sure would be nice if we got a day off for the president's birthday, like they do for the queen's. Of course, then we would have a lot of people voting for a candidate born on July 3 or December 26, just for the long weekends. --Age 8 * Democracy is a beautiful thing, except for that part about letting just any old yokel vote. --Age 10 * Home is where your house is. --Age 6 * For centuries, people thought the moon was made of green cheese. Then the astronauts found that the moon is really a big hard rock. That's what happens to cheese when you leave it out. --Age 6 * As you make your way through this hectic world of ours, set aside a few minutes each day. At the end of the year, you'll have a couple of days saved up. --Age 7 * Often, when I am reading a good book, I stop and thank my teacher. That is, I used to, until she got an unlisted number. -- Age 15 * It would be terrible if the Red Cross Bloodmobile got into an accident. No, wait. That would be good because if anyone needed it, the blood would be right there. --Age 5 * Think of the biggest number you can. Now add five. Then, imagine if you had that many Twinkies. Wow, that's five more than the biggest number you could come up with! --Age 6 * The only stupid question is the one that is never asked, except maybe "Don't you think it is about time you audited my return?" or "Isn't it morally wrong to give me a warning when, in fact, I was speeding?" --Age 15 * If we could just get everyone to close their eyes and visualize world peace for an hour, imagine how serene and quiet it would be until the looting started. --Age 15 ____________________________________________ After tucking their three-year-old child Sammy in bed one night, his parents heard sobbing coming from his room. Rushing back in, they found him crying hysterically. He managed to tell them that he had swallowed a penny and he was sure he was going to die. No amount of talking was helping. His father, in an attempt to calm him down, palmed a penny from his pocket and pretended to pull it from Sammy's ear. Sammy was delighted. In a flash, he snatched it from his father's hand, swallowed it, and then cheerfully demanded, "Do it again, Dad!" ____________________________________________ A lady came to the hospital to visit a friend. She had not been in a hospital for several years and felt uneasy, not knowing about all the new technology. A technician followed her onto the elevator, wheeling a large, intimidating looking machine with tubes and wires and dials. "Boy, would I hate to be hooked up to that thing," she said. "So would I," replied the technician. "It's a floor-cleaning machine." _______________________________ | Ophelia Dingbatter's NewsNo sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request. |
___________________________________________________ | Today December 5 in 1560 Charles IX succeeded as King of France on the death of Francis II. 1797 Napoleon Bonaparte arrived in Paris to command forces for the invasion of England. 1812 Napoleon Bonaparte left his army as they were retreating from Russia. 1848 U.S. President Polk triggered the Gold Rush of '49 by confirming the fact that gold had been discovered in California. 1876 The Stillson wrench was patented by D.C. Stillson. The device was the first practical pipe wrench. 1904 The Russian fleet was destroyed by the Japanese at Port Arthur, during the Russo-Japanese War. 1908 At the University of Pittsburgh, numerals were first used on football uniforms worn by college football players. 1913 Britain outlawed the sending of arms to Ireland. 1932 German physicist Albert Einstein was granted a visa making it possible for him to travel to the U.S. 1933 Prohibition came to an end when Utah became the 36th state to ratify the 21st Amendment to the U.S. Constitution. 1934 Fighting broke out between Italian and Ethiopian troops on the Somalian border. 1934 The Soviet Union executed 66 people charged with plotting against Joseph Stalin's government. 1935 In Montebello, CA, the first commercial hydroponics operation was established. 1936 The Soviet Union adopted a new Constitution under a Supreme Council. 1944 During World War II, Allied troops took Ravenna, Italy. 1945 The so-called "Lost Squadron" disappeared. The five U.S. Navy Avenger bombers carrying 14 Navy flyers began a training mission at the Ft. Lauderdale Naval Air Station. They were never heard from again. 1951 The first push button-controlled garage opened in Washington, DC. 1956 British and French forces began a withdrawal from Egypt during the Suez War. 1958 Britain's first motorway, the Preston by-pass, was opened by Prime Minister Macmillan. 1961 United Nations forces launched an attack in Katanga, Congo, near Elizabethville. 1962 The U.S. and the Soviet Union agreed to cooperate in the peaceful uses of outer space. 1971 The Soviet Union, at United Nations Security Council, vetoed a resolution calling for a cease-fire in hostilities between India and Pakistan over Kashmir. 1976 Jacques Chirac re-founded the Gaullist party as the RPR (Rassemblement pour la Rpublique). 1977 Egypt broke diplomatic relations with Syria, Libya, Algeria, Iraq and South Yemen due to peaceful relations with Israel. 1978 The American space probe Pioneer Venus I, orbiting Venus, began beaming back its first information and picture of the planet. 1979 Sonia Johnson was formally excommunicated by the Mormon Church due to her outspoken support for the proposed Equal Rights Amendment to the Constitution. 1983 In west Beirut, Lebanon, more than a dozen people were killed when a car bomb shattered a nine-story apartment building. 1984 Iran's official news agency quoted the hijackers of a Kuwaiti jetliner parked at Tehran airport as saying they would blow up the plane unless Kuwait released 14 imprisoned extremists. 1986 The Soviet Union said it would continue to abide by the SALT II treaty limits on nuclear weapons. This was despite the decision by the U.S. to exceed them. 1988 Jim Bakker and former aide Richard Dortch were indicted by a federal grand jury in North Carolina on fraud and conspiracy charges. 1989 Israeli soldiers killed five heavily armed Arab guerrillas who crossed the border from Egypt. The guerrillas were allegedly going to launch a terrorist attack commemorating the anniversary of the Palestinian uprising. 1989 East Germany's former leaders were placed under house arrest. 1992 Russian President Boris Yeltsin kept the power to appoint Cabinet ministers, defeating a constitutional amendment that would have put his team of reformers under the control of Russia's Congress. 1998 James P. Hoffa became the head of the Teamsters union, 23 years after his father was the head. His father disappeared and was presumed dead. 2001 In Germany, Afghan leaders signed a pact to create a temporary administration for post-Taliban Afghanistan. Two women were included in the cabinet structure. Hamid Karzai and his Cabinet were planned to take over power in Afghanistan on December 22. 2008 The iTunes Music Store reached 300 million applications downloaded. 2010 NASA's Mars Odyssey spacecraft became the longest-operating spacecraft ever sent to Mars. The Odyssey entered orbit around Mars on October 23, 2001. 2014 NASA's Orion Multi-Purpose Crew Vehicle (MPCV) debuted when it was launched for a four hour test flight. It landed on target in the Pacific Ocean. 2020 Do smiled. |
|
If you can help with the cost of the
Humor Letter, please donate what you can! | |
Go to TOP
Well, Do , that's all for today.
Have FUN !
Dear Webby from Webby.com
Please give a friend a subscription to the Humor Letter
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter,
please vote for it at the Ezine Finder:
Thanks for your votes!
ARCHIVE: If you missed previous issues, you can see them
in the Humor Letter Blog at http://webby.com/humor/blog
If the greeting on top does NOT have your first name,
or at least your favorite nickname, please tell me.
I can correct that in two seconds and greet you properly
from then on.
If you want to give a gift subscription to a friend, but don't
have time to subscribe her or him, just hit REPLY and tell me.
I will gladly enter them for you and send them a confirmation request.
To reply to me personally, just hit REPLY or write to humor@webby.com
If you do not normally get the Humor Letter every day, and this was the first time,
then a friend sent you a one time sample or maybe even gave you a gift subscription.
If you like the Humor Letter, then you can subscribe at http://webby.com/sub.html
You can also UNsubscribe there.
If you don't want to receive the Webby Humor Letter,
please unsubscribe by clicking the link below:
You are currently subscribed to the Regular HTML version with this address:
newsletter@newslettercollector.com
UNSUBSCRIBE from the regular HTMLversion Give a friend a free gift subscription to the Humor Letter . | Search the web for:
Recommended Resources Find a human
Bypass voice menus
Web Tools
handy program downloads
SPAM CONTROL made Easy!
Click here for a FREE
30 day trial
This is the Mail Washer that I use and have
used for over 10 years. I have tested many
others, but Mail Washer is still The Best
spam control UNinstall completely and safely whatever you don't want anymore. I have used it for many years and highly recommend it. It even does an inventory of what you got and shows long forgotten stuff. Choose a reliable essay writing service
to cope with your assignments
much faster. Crap Cleaner Safely get rid of
tons of useless crap left over from
old, obsolete updates, temp files, lost
file fragments, etc.
STILL FREE
Babelfish Translator Converter Urban Legends
Truth or Hoax?
Check before believing chain letters
Great tool for getting rid of
spy-ware and mal-ware. Still FREE
This Undeleter will easily and securely recover deleted files from hard drives, flash drives, USB external drives, Zip drives, Firewire drives, digital camera cards, and more. This powerful recovery software can recover deleted files from most data loss scenarios.
Is your data worth recovery? SmartFix The ONLY Registry Fixer, that I recommend!
All In One PX Fixer has all the necessary tools included: Fix System Errors, Improve Startup, Clean Registry, Defrag Disk, Optimize System Settings, Back-Up, etc. Currently Smart OC Fixer is 50% off regular price!
Where is YOUR site?
Web Space for YOU,
from $2.50 up. Commercal grade:
No ads, no limits.
Full control, not just a myspace page.
Post your eBay detail pictures.
Domain Name registration:
Discuss your needs first, don't just register a name, that might not be good for you! Ask DearWebby first. That will save you a lot of money!
YOUR OWN
Postcard Site ! You too can easily have a postcard site for business or fun.
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Cumuli Ezine Finder: Etiquette To Get Read
Ebook with power tips
for effective writing,
by DearWebby
Ads are $50 per month for subscribers only.
$60 per month for anybody else.
Dear Bubba
All is forgiven. I still love you. Please come back!
Ps. Congratulations on your lottery win!
Your Betty-Sue
That could be YOUR ad for $50 per month.
Subscribers only!
Nudist Colony of Alberta
Closed for the season
Space Weather
Solar storms, Auroras
Thesaurus
NASA Multimedia Gallery Sky Map: the interactive planetarium of the Web
Sky Watch: Calendar of celestial events
Weather Underground
Maps and Satellite
Do, Please Feed
Dear Webby!
Privacy Policy
Unique visitors since 1/1/11
Have FUN
Dear Webby
CEO of Webby, Inc
EB (Eligible Bachelor) DearWebby @ webby.com
Box 646
Black Diamond, AB T0L 0H0
Canada |
Unique visitors since 1/1/11
| Subscribe | Give a Gift Subscription | Unsubscribe
Click here for Large Print
|
|
