Jeremy Hunt: Thick Cut

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"I do not have a 10 inch penis. I
do not. Seriously. Terry Bollea's
penis is not 10 inches. Believe
that" – Hulk Hogan/Terry Bollea
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POPBITCH _ _ _ _
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|_| |_|10.02.15 ISSUE 776
Free email every week
Subscribe http://eepurl.com/XSZoP
Email stories hello@popbitch.com
* Hulk Hogan Vs Gawker
* Union J Vs Dan Wootton
* Charts: Lukas Graham still No 1
------------------------------------

>> Academy records Leo's got bed bugs

With four decades of celebrity
sex offences having come to
light in recent years, it is
an uncertain time for many
A-list lotharios.

Thankfully, one well-known
shagger is taking all the
right precautions.

Leonardo DiCaprio bugs his
hotel room before entertaining
any visitors so he has a sound
recording to prove that
everything's consensual.

------------------------------------
Q/ What do Pitbull's friends
call him?
A/ Pit.
------------------------------------

>> Big Questions Who's asking what this week?

Which contestant on The Jump
tried that old "Oh sorry,
I was drunk and went into the
wrong room" trick in the cast
hotel? (The person that they
'accidentally' stumbled in on
decided to change hotels.)

------------------------------------
RIP Ray Tomlinson. In Swedish the @
symbol is known as 'snabel A' which
translates as 'elephant trunk A'.
------------------------------------

>> Rolling in the deep Adele's Spinal Tap moment

Adele has always had the talent,
but never quite the batshit
behaviour to make her one of
the world's leading divas.
However, we're happy to report
that she might be about to
turn a corner.

On the first night of her tour
in Manchester, instead of
walking, Adele was seen being
wheeled around backstage on a
giant flight case.

Like this one:
http://bit.ly/1Le8Xkh

------------------------------------
Scared of getting ill on tour, Adele
insists her crew all have a weekly
medical. No medical means no sticker
on your pass. No sticker, no show.
------------------------------------

>> Marr-malade Not so big in Japan

As part of an interview about
Britain's future in the EU on
Andrew Marr's show last Sunday,
Boris Johnson got himself tied
up in a rather weird debate
with Marr about the difficulties
involved in trading marmalade
with Italy – talking about pip
quotas, poison and the like.

If Andrew Marr had wanted to
talk to an MP about the
difficulties of the marmalade
trade, he should have booked
Jeremy Hunt. One of Hunt's
early business ventures was a
company which tried to export
marmalade to Japan.

It flopped.

------------------------------------
Mark Ronson tells anyone who
sleeps in the same house as him
that he nude sleepwalks.
------------------------------------

>> Union of the snake The Sun is down on George

It's not just the Queen that
the Sun has picked a fight with.
They've also chosen a much
tougher adversary: boyband fans.

Showbiz supremo Dan Wootton
interviewed Union J about
George Shelley's departure.
The band tried to be positive,
but it didn't come out like that,
with Wootton's piece focusing
instead on Shelley's "diva
behaviour". The band's fans
were left fuming.

But why would a journalist of
such international renown
resort to underhand tactics?
Apparently Wootton was furious
that George came out in his
own video blog, and let slip
that he thought the pages of
his paper should be the only
place where pop stars reveal
their sexuality.

------------------------------------
According to Comscore, the average
number of apps installed by the
average American per month is zero.
------------------------------------

>> Uncredible Hulk The man with two dicks

The Hulk Hogan v Gawker court
case may come to define free
speech and privacy on the internet.
Even if it doesn't, it's going
to be the most entertaining
celebrity trial of the year.

So far this week we've had:
Hulk Hogan disavowing his
comments about having a ten inch
penis under oath. Hulk's lawyer
turning out to be a man who looks
like the love child of Donald
Trump and Michael Fabricant.
But best of all, we got to
hear ex-Gawker editor A.J.
Daulerio's deposition,
which made Paul McMullan's
Leveson Inquiry evidence
("Privacy is for paedos!")
look positively sane:

LAWYER: Can you imagine a
situation where a celebrity
sex tape would not be news-
worthy?
AJ: If they were a child.
LAWYER: Under what age?
AJ: Four.
LAWYER: No four-year-old
sex tapes. Okay.

We've been keeping a running
tab of the defence strategies
Gawker is deploying, in a simple
summary of the case for you:
http://bit.ly/1WbSFci

************************************
>> The Popbitch Quiz Returns Gossip, trivia and the filthiest
arts and crafts tasks in London
– the Popbitch Popquiz is coming
to Smiths Of Smithfield on April
12th. Book your tickets here now:
http://bit.ly/1R95FRQ
************************************

>> Killer Queen Our money's on Taylor

Showing once again why John
Deacon is everyone's favourite
living member of Queen - Sacha
Baron Cohen spoke to Rolling
Stone about the Freddie Mercury
biopic he was making with
Roger Taylor and Brian May.

"A member of the band, I won't
say who, he said, 'This is
such a great movie because
it's got such an amazing thing
that happens in the middle of
the movie,'" Cohen recalled.
"I go, 'What happens in the
middle of the movie?'

"He goes, 'Freddie dies'."

Read more:
http://rol.st/1XeIZOa

------------------------------------
Popbitch's favourite Bangkok
drinking den? The Otter Bar.
(Unsurprisingly, the seafood
selection is excellent.)
------------------------------------

>> Salmon's leap Fishy move for BBC exec

Peter Salmon's defection from
BBC to indie behemoth Endemol
Shine has caused a few raised
eyebrows across the TV world.

Salmon was the man who ran
the in-house production arm
of the BBC. Two months ago
he did a deal which allowed
40% of the BBC's in-house
productions to go out to
tender to independent companies.

Independent companies very
much like... Endemol Shine!

------------------------------------
Nominative determinism of the week:
Steve Rolles, chairman of the
Transform Drug Policy Foundation.
------------------------------------

>> No jacket required More news from Mourinho days

Former Chelsea FC doctor Eva
Carneiro was also up in court
this week. It looks like the
case will go to trial in June
unless the club and her former
manager, Jose Mourinho, settle.

There's a fair few Chelsea FC
employees who won't support
Mourinho in this though, as
further tales of people he
alienated at the club leak
out. As well as the doctor
and the players, he annoyed
coaches and scouts too.

You know those jackets with
initials on that football types
wear? Jose decided only he was
special enough for gear like
that, so scouts wanting to
show they were officially from
Chelsea FC had to find
something else.

As you can imagine, they
were not impressed.

------------------------------------
Adam Johnson is about to become
the most notorious right-winger
in prison since Anders Breivik.
------------------------------------

>> The Swede spot All grown up; all sewn up

Looks like Sweden might be about
to enter a bit of an Ireland-in-
the-90s Eurovision hot streak.

The reigning champions are
already boasting this year's
Eurovision favourite - even
though the song in question
hasn't actually won their own
national selection yet.

Frans' song, If I Were Sorry,
is like Bieber meets Lukas
Graham, with a touch of Catch
& Release. He is currently
number one in Sweden and already
appearing on Europe-wide
Spotify playlists.

And, most adorably of all, he's
a previous child star, whose
World Cup ode to Zlatan
Ibrahimovich was the biggest
hit in Sweden in 2006:

Take a look:
http://bit.ly/1phUUAx

************************************
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>> Hmmms Metal, fire, music

Phil Mitchell fan site:
http://www.utterphilth.com

Ted Cruz as you've never heard
him before:
http://bit.ly/1P1NaXC

A curious questionnaire on
music, that's not really a
questionnaire. Or about music:
http://bit.ly/1TtcXzP

Awkward metal bands:
http://bit.ly/1SC9Cxx

A giant gummy bear fire:
http://bit.ly/1U3R2zh

The IDF continue their
attempts to go viral:
http://bit.ly/1RBwGHM

************************************
Thanks to: monstris, SG, iPitt, SA,
CM, HC, NG, JF, theabominablehoman,
CC, ML, AM, danceswithmustelids,
************************************

Old Jokes Home:
Just viewed a house for sale
entirely filled with mirrors.

I thought, I can really see
myself living here.

Still Bored?
High quality British made clothes.
Back the Kickstarter and get cool
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