Ophelia Dingbatter's News NO Sermon here, not for church, just jokes and fun for adults. |
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Good Morning, John! Today is Thursday, May 6 (`v) Ophelia Those who matter don't judge me. Those who judge me don't matter.
Those, who click me some grocery money, REALLY matter. Those who matter don't judge me. Those who judge me don't matter.
Those, who click me some grocery money, REALLY matter. Renew / Upgrade ____________________________________________________ This version is just for testing your email, whether you COULD receive my newsletter or not. If you DO receive this, then you can subscribe to the full version. To keep out little kids, the full version costs one dollar a month or ten dollars a year. PayPal does the age check. You can even use credit or debit cards at PayPal if you don't have a PayPal account yet.
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ONE of the many jokes from the full version: ___________________________________________________ 3 A woman is enjoying a good game of bridge with her girlfriends one evening. "Oh, no! I have to rush home and fix dinner for my husband! He's going to really be ticked if it's not ready on time." When she gets home, she realizes she doesn't have enough time to go to the supermarket, and all she has in the cupboard is a wilted lettuce leaf, an egg, and a can of cat food. In a panic, she opens the can of cat food, stirs in the egg, and garnishes it with the lettuce leaf just as her husband is pulling up. She greets her husband and then watches in horror as he sits down to his dinner. To her surprise, the husband is really enjoying his dinner. "Darling, this is the best dinner you have made for me in forty years of marriage. You can make this for me any old day." Needless to say, every bridge night from then on, the woman made her husband the same dish. She told her bridge cronies about it and they were all horrified. "You're going to kill him!" they exclaimed. Two months later, her husband died. The woman were sitting around the table playing bridge when one of the cronies said, "You killed him! We told you that feeding him that cat food every week would do him in! How can you just sit there so calmly and play bridge knowing you murdered your husband?" The wife stoically replied, "I didn't kill him. He fell off the mantel while he was licking his ass!" ______________________________________________________
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Enjoy! (`v) Ophelia Enjoy! Ophelia ----------------------------------------- ---------ooooO----------------------- ---------( )-------Ooooo-------. ----------\ (---------( )-------- -----------\ \---------) /---------- ----------- \ _)--------/ /------------ -----------------------(_ /-------------- -----------------------------------------
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