Ophelia Dingbatter's News NO Sermon here, not for church, just jokes and fun for adults. |
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Good Morning, John! Today is Saturday, October 16 (`v) Ophelia Those who matter don't judge me. Those who judge me don't matter.Those, who click me some grocery money, REALLY matter.
Renew / Upgrade Those who matter don't judge me. Those who judge me don't matter.
Those, who click me some grocery money, REALLY matter. Renew / Upgrade ____________________________________________________ This version is just for testing your email, whether you COULD receive my newsletter or not. If you DO receive this, then you can subscribe to the full version. To keep out little kids, the full version costs one dollar a month or ten dollars a year. PayPal does the age check. You can even use credit or debit cards at PayPal if you don't have a PayPal account yet.
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ONE of the many jokes from the full version: The kid safe joke is clean! ___________________________________________________ 4 Maxine for president! 1. Maxine on "Driver Safety" - "I can't use the cell phone in the car. I have to keep my hands free for making gestures." 2. Maxine on "Life" - "Life is like an oven. It burns my a**!" 3. Maxine on "Housework" - "I do my housework in the nude. It gives me an incentive to clean the mirrors as quickly as possible." 4.Maxine on "Lawn Care" - "The key to a nice-looking lawn is a good mower. I recommend one who is muscular and shirtless." 5. Maxine on "The Perfect Man" - 'All I'm looking for is a guy who'll do what I want, when I want, for as long as I want, and then go away. Or wait nearby, like a Dust Buster, charged up and ready when needed." 6. Maxine on "Work" - "My performance at work has really improved over the years. Now I can nail a co-worker with a paper-clip shot from a rubber band at 20 yards." 7. Maxine on "Technology Revolution" - "My idea of rebooting is kicking somebody in the ass twice." 8. Maxine on "Aging" -"Take every birthday with a grain of salt. This works much better if the salt accompanies a large Margarita." ___________________________________________________
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Enjoy! (`v) Ophelia Enjoy! Ophelia ----------------------------------------- ---------ooooO----------------------- ---------( )-------Ooooo-------. ----------\ (---------( )-------- -----------\ \---------) /---------- ----------- \ _)--------/ /------------ -----------------------(_ /-------------- -----------------------------------------
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