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You've got to Bee kidding!
This week we caught up with the brilliant scientist and national health policy maker, Fake Dr. Fauci who was on his way back from the now infamous Wuhan China Lab. Fake Dr. Fauci shared with us the "Wheel of Science", a remarkable tool that he and the CDC use to arrive at seemingly arbitrary public health policy decisions which affect the entire population (with the exception of Congress, as they are not affected by any rules at all). When asked about his thoughts on the UnMask, Fake Dr. Fauci said that he strongly disapproved of them because they allow people to actually breathe. "Our wish here at the NIH and the CDC is to inflict the maximum amount of fear, pain and suffering on the American people. The fact that UnMask offers wearers virtually unrestricted breathing and all day comfort goes against everything we are trying to accomplish." said Fake Dr. Fauci.
Fake Dr. Fauci was also upset that the UnMask offers Americans a variety of colors and styles which allow them to express some degree of individuality when FORCED to mask up. Fake Fauci exclaimed "This is counter to this administration's goal of creating unrecognized, expressionless compliant masses, paralyzed with fear and all wearing blue paper Chinese made masks". Fake Fauci also said that the Made in USA UnMask has eroded his vast investments in Chinese paper mask manufacturers.
To celebrate our fake interview with the infamous Fake Dr. Fauci we are offering 25% off site wide. Use the code BeeFauci at checkout. Hurry offer ends on 1/23/22 (for real)!
Disclaimer: Fake Dr. Fauci is not to be confused with the real Dr Fauci. Fake Dr.Fauci is experimental and not approved by the Real Dr. Fauci, the FDA, NIH, CDC, FBI, CIA, WHO, NHRA, NBA, NFL or NASCAR and LGB
People forced to mask, UnMask and refuse to wear anything else!
Hand sewn in the USA, the UnMask is the only mask on the market specifically designed to provide you and your family with virtually unrestricted breathing.
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