Dear John, Yesterday, I visited my Mother’s house for the first time since she passed. It was a bittersweet gathering with my six siblings, and as hard as it was to be in our family home without our Mom, it was a blessing to be together. On the drive there, I was a little anxious about the meeting. It’s a tricky thing for seven adults to navigate a painful loss at the same time. After all, people grieve in different ways, and when in a tender state, they often have conflicting needs. But we found our way. That’s because our Mother instilled in us the belief that family was important and we needed to stick together. Whenever we disagreed, my Mother gently (and sometimes not so gently) steered the one who wandered off back to the litter like a protective Mama cat. While we’d undoubtedly have disagreements throughout our lives, she’d remind us to always find a way back to each other. I had no idea how much I’d appreciate this wisdom after she – the final parent – was gone. My Mother gave our family another gift—a house pared down to the essentials. I was shocked to discover that her basement was emptied except for a couple of bins of holiday decorations. Her closets had clothes, but not too many, and some drawers in her bathroom and bedroom were empty. She often said she refused to leave a mess for her kids, and she made good on her promise. When we gather again in a couple of weeks to begin the process of dismantling the house (ugh, just typing that phrase breaks my heart), I’ll be sad but grateful. I’ll appreciate having the emotional space to grieve without feeling overwhelmed by the task at hand. I’ll value the chance to reminisce with my sisters over the things our Mother chose to keep because they mattered to her. And I’ll do my best to remember her gift so I stay inspired to choose simplicity over too much stuff. Thanks to my Mother, when my time comes, I’ll leave a house filled with memories, not things. Love, Cheryl P.S. – In the spirit of simplicity, I’m giving away a limited number of CD sets of “The Practice Building Workshop” for coaches, and “How to Survive the Loss of a Pet.” If you’d like a set, hit reply and send us your address with the program you’d like and we’ll ship it to you. First come, first served while supplies last. Need a little Divine Direction? Use the “Touch of Grace” button at the bottom of our homepage here.
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